Heartless by Cheryl Douglas Read Free Book Online Page B

relationship with your
kids.”
    She shook her
head. “I could never let that happen. I still care for you, but Jay and Mike
are a part of me, the best part. I can’t imagine them not being in my life.”
    He released her
hand and bowed his head. “I’d like to say I understand, but I’m not a parent,
so I don’t know exactly what you’re feelin’. I know it’s an impossible choice.”
    It was an
impossible choice. She and Derek hadn’t been a couple since they were kids
themselves. They didn’t even know if they’d be compatible anymore. How could
she risk her relationship with her children on the off-chance this relationship
could be as wonderful as they remembered? Was anything in life able to live up
to the memory of that first love? Not in her experience.
    “I don’t know what
to say. I’m just so confused.”
    He slid off his
stool and stood in front of her. “I think we both need a little time to think.”
He framed her face with his hands. “This has come at us out of nowhere. We need
to figure out where the hell to go from here, and we can’t do that as long as I’m
here crowdin’ you.”
    His presence
didn’t make her feel stifled. He made her feel safe, protected… cherished. She
didn’t want him to go, but she knew she couldn’t ask him to stay under the
circumstances. If they made love again, she knew it would be impossible to let
him go back to his life in Arkansas. When or if she invited him back into her
bed, she needed to know that he was committed to building a new life in
Nashville, with her.
    “Can I call you in
a few days? Maybe we can go out for dinner?”
    She couldn’t
imagine waiting that long to talk to him. Knowing that he was in the same city,
a short drive away, would be torture. “Sure. School’s out for the summer, so
I’m pretty flexible.”
    He pressed a
tender kiss to her lips as she brought her hands to his shoulders. She wanted
more. She wanted to know if he still tasted the way she remembered, if he could
still ignite her with just one kiss, even after all these years. But just when
she thought he was ready to take it a step further, he stepped back, just out
of her reach.
    He chuckled. “That
was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but we both know what will happen if
I kiss you the way I want to right now.”
    She did know what
would happen. They’d end up in her bed, and as much as she wanted to believe it
would be the start of something amazing, it could just as easily end in
heartache for both of them.
    “Let me walk you
out.”
    He laced his
fingers through hers as she walked him through the kitchen and foyer to the front
door. “Do you still have my number?”
    He smiled. “It
hasn’t changed.”
    She tipped her
head to one side. “How do you know that?”
    “I’ve picked up
the phone to call you dozens of times over the years, Ash. Sometimes I’d hang up
before you answered, other times I’d get the machine and be afraid to leave a
message, or one of the boys would answer and I’d just hang up.”
    She laughed. “I
can’t believe you did that. You’re the most confident guy I know. It’s not like
you to second guess yourself.”
    He nodded.
“Usually, you’re right, but when it comes to you, all bets are off.”
    She pressed a kiss
to his mouth because she couldn’t let him leave without touching his full, warm
lips just one more time.
    He groaned and
bowed his head. “I’d better get outta here while I still can.”
    She watched him
walk down the stone stairs leading to her paved drive, and she knew that sleep
would be fleeting tonight.
    Derek drove
through the dark night, heading in the direction of his parents’ ranch house,
but the closer he got, the worse he felt. He needed a stiff drink, not a quiet
house filled with memories and tears.
    He made a U-turn
and a sharp left, deciding his kid brother’s bar might be his best option. If
he wasn’t up to the long drive back, he knew J.T. had a fully equipped
apartment