Hobbled by John Inman Read Free Book Online Page A

It’s like this, see. My boss pissed me off, so I flipped the ice machine over to get back at him, and then I wasn’t watching what I was doing because I was busy throwing all the hamburgers out the drive-thru window and I slipped in the ice and broke my leg and the judge thought it was pretty funny but he didn’t think it was funny enough to let me off the hook scot-free so once my dad talked him out of making me go to jail, the judge slapped this monitor on my ankle and told me I have to wear it for six weeks and since this is just the second day I’ve still got nearly six weeks to go before it comes off but I’m not dangerous or anything so you don’t have to worry about living next to me and even if I was dangerous I can’t leave the yard or the red light comes on and then ten thousand cops will come and beat me to death with night sticks so you’d be safe anyway.”
    Danny finally managed to force his mouth shut by sheer willpower, sort of like closing a rusty gate. Then he said, conversationally, sanely, nonchalantly, and as if he hadn’t been mindlessly jabbering for the last forty-five seconds like a lunatic, “And how about you? Moving in, huh?”
    Luke gave a little headshake. “Wow. That was a whole lot of information there.”
    He stared at Danny for a minute and finally seemed to come to the conclusion that Danny was normal. Danny couldn’t imagine why.
    Without answering Danny’s question, Luke dropped to his knees and took a closer look at the monitor around Danny’s ankle. Him and the dog both checked it out. While he was checking it out, Luke cupped Danny’s calf in his hand and lifted the foot up closer to his face to get a better look.
    Danny gasped at the feel of Luke’s hand on the skin of his leg, then he gasped again because he started to lose his balance, and when he started to lose his balance, he dropped the hedge clippers and reached out for the only thing available to brace himself against, which happened to be Luke’s head.
    With his hand in Luke’s hair, and Luke’s hand on his bare leg, Danny thought he had died and gone to heaven. When Luke looked up at him with his face no more than a foot away from Danny’s crotch Danny figured this was a major improvement on heaven. Heck, heaven was probably nothing compared to this. Heaven was probably Newark compared to this.
    Luke smiled up at Danny. He seemed to be inordinately amused by Danny’s wide, wide eyes looking down at him. “You’re enjoying yourself, aren’t you?”
    Danny could only nod.
    Luke stroked the back of Danny’s leg. He didn’t seem to be shy about it either. “So do you have a name or are you just known as the criminal mastermind of the neighborhood?”
    That made Danny laugh. “Danny,” he sputtered, still engrossed with the feel of Luke’s hair between his fingers and Luke’s fingers on the back of his leg. “My name is Danny.”
    Luke patted Danny’s calf and gave it a couple of strokes before releasing it and hauling himself to his feet.
    “Well, this is going to be fun, Danny. Let’s get to know each other, what do you say?”
    Luke looked down at the monitor on Danny’s right foot. He cocked his head to the side and stared at it for about five heartbeats, like he was thinking things over. Then he looked like he had thought things over long enough and had finally come to a decision.
    “Your place it is then,” Luke finally said. “My place seems to be out of your, shall we say, comfort zone. Plus it doesn’t have any furniture in it. Plus they haven’t turned the water on yet.” Luke took Danny’s hand and pulled Danny in the direction of his front door.
    Tail wagging, tongue lolling, Granger padded along beside them.
    Two minutes later, they were drinking Cokes at Danny’s kitchen table. Except for Granger. Granger was having water and a bowl of cat food. It was the only pet food Danny had in the house.
    Frederick was hissing from the top of the fridge at the fucking dog because the