Incubus Dreams by Laurell K. Hamilton Read Free Book Online Page B

couldn’t protect them.” He began to collapse to his knees, and if I hadn’t caught him, he’d have fallen. But I did catch him, and I lowered us both to the edge of grass near the trees. I sat on the grass and held him, rocked him, while he cried, not for himself, but for all the people he couldn’t save.
    I held him until the crying quieted, then stopped, and I held him some more in the windswept silence. I held him and let the October wind wash us both clean. Clean of sadness, clean of that horrible urge I had to tear things down. I made myself a promise sitting there in the grass, with the feel of him wrapped around my body. I promised not to poke at things anymore. I promised not to break things if they were working. I promised not to stir up shit, if it didn’t have to be stirred. I said a little prayer to help me keep those promises. Because, God knew, that the chances of me keeping any of those promises without divine intervention were slim to none.

7
    B Y THE TIME Nathaniel and Jason came looking for us Micah was back to normal. Normal for Micah meant that if I hadn’t seen him break down, even I wouldn’t have guessed. In fact, he was so back to normal that it made me wonder how many other breakdowns I’d missed. Or had I caused this one? Was he able to maintain absolute control as long as no one made him look at it? Of course, even if that were true, that didn’t sound very healthy. Oh, hell, maybe we all needed therapy. If I took the entire pard in, maybe we could get a group discount.
    Nathaniel sat on the other side of me, putting me in the middle. He sat so that the line of his body touched mine as much as possible. There was a time when I’d have made him give me breathing space, but I understood the shapeshifter’s need for physical contact now. Besides, making Nathaniel move over an inch when he slept mostly naked in my bed nearly every night would have been silly. Jason just stood and looked down at all of us. He looked unnaturally solemn, at least for him, then suddenly he broke into a grin. Now he looked like himself.
    â€œIt’s after midnight, we thought you’d be outside feeding the ardeur .” His grin was way too wicked to match the mildish words.
    â€œI’m able to go longer between feedings,” I said, “sometimes fourteen, or even sixteen hours.”
    â€œOh, pooh,” he said, and stamped his foot, pouting. It was a wonderful imitation of a childish snit, except for the devilish twinkle in his eye. “I was hoping to take another one for the team.”
    I frowned at him, but couldn’t make it go all the way up to my eyes. Jason amused me, I don’t know why, but he always had. “I don’t think we’ll be needing your services tonight, thanks for offering though.”
    He gave an exaggerated sigh. “I am never going to get to have sex with you again, am I?”
    â€œDon’t take this wrong, Jason, but I hope not. The sex was amazing, butwhat put you in my bed was an emergency. If I can’t control the ardeur better than that, then I’m not safe to be out in public alone.”
    â€œIt was my fault,” Nathaniel said, voice soft.
    I turned my head and was close enough to the side of his face to have kissed his cheek. I wanted to make him move, to give me more room, but I fought the urge off. I was just being grumpy. “It was my fault if it was anyone’s, Nathaniel.”
    Micah’s so-calm voice came from my other shoulder. “It was Belle Morte’s fault, the wicked, sexy vampire of the west. If she hadn’t been messing with Anita, trying to use the ardeur to control her, then it wouldn’t have risen hours ahead of schedule.” Belle Morte, Beautiful Death, was the creator of Jean-Claude’s bloodline. I’d never met her in physical person, but I’d met her metaphysically, and that had been bad enough. Micah laid a hand across my