turn. She was shooting me a look that was as predictable as it was irritating. Some of us thought we were here to witness two families coming together in holy matrimony. Not Diane. I knew better. She was losing one son this week. The idea, however unlikely, that she could lose me to Vanessa now was probably sending her into a full-blown tailspin.
I couldn’t bring myself to care. I’d stopped caring about what she and Frank wanted a long time ago. My brother and sister had followed suit in their own time. One by one, they’d opted not to live under the superficial and unrealistic expectations that our parents had grown to believe were normal—white-collar jobs, debutante dating, country clubs.
Fuck all that. I wanted to live .
“What are you thinking about?”
I considered Vanessa’s question a moment, wondering how I could explain what had happened to our family over the past fifteen years. Did I even know?
I tightened my hold on her and searched her thoughtful eyes. “I was thinking about you,” I fibbed, but quickly turned it into the truth. One look at Vanessa and she’d stolen every thought. I’d been with plenty of beautiful women, but had anyone ever captivated me this way? I searched and came up with nothing, and I was suddenly compelled to know why. What was it about her that drew me to her this way?
She laughed. “Yeah, right.”
“No, right now I’m thinking I want to know everything about you. Which is lucky because we’ve got the whole week together.”
“Why am I suddenly so interesting to you?”
I didn’t know how to answer that truthfully. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her for the better part of the last twenty-four hours. Already I knew she wasn’t like anyone else. Still, she looked genuinely perplexed. God, she really had no idea what she did to men.
I was determined to figure her out, and I was determined to get her under me.
“I think there’s a lot more to you than meets the eye. Believe me, everything that meets the eye is driving me fucking nuts, but I want more. I want to see everything else.”
She was quiet a moment. “From what I know, that seems unlike you.”
I stared at her silently, not liking this reputation thing that kept coming between us. A little voice in my head told me I should let her off the hook. Like she said, I could make plenty of friends on this trip. But I couldn’t bring myself to give up that easily. I wanted to know Vanessa, and I wasn’t going to let my past get in the way.
“You know what? You’ve got a past too. I’m guessing you’ve got a life with some shadows that maybe you’d rather not see the light. How about we forget all that? For the next few days, let’s just be us, without all the baggage. Let me get to know you, Vanessa, and I’ll do my best to let you get to know me too.”
“Okay.”
Relief settled in my shoulders.
She took a breath, seeming resigned to the proposition, and simultaneously giving me a new spark of hope. I had a feeling she might have been overthinking her decision to devote any amount of time to me on this vacation. She’d be wise to, but I was determined to keep her talking.
“You want to go for a walk? Get away from all the prying eyes?”
After one glance in my mother’s direction, she returned her attention to me with a tight smile and a quick nod. “Sure.”
Together we walked away from the party and down to the water. The sky had gone from pink and purple to a deep magical blue that matched the darkened waves crashing gently at our feet.
I threaded my hand into hers and she didn’t protest. Good sign, I thought, but also there was something comforting about the simple connection that had nothing to do with the great sex I hoped it would eventually lead to.
“So tell me about you. I want to know the real Vanessa Hawkins.”
“I wish I had an epic tale for you, but my story really isn’t anything special.”
“I find that hard to believe. The woman I met at the
Stop in the Name of Pants!