Jennifer Government: A Novel by Max Barry Read Free Book Online

selected for low incomes. I hate to say it, but it’s going to be tough to get budget on this one.”
    “What about leads?”
    “We’ve got two. First, a dead bad guy, courtesy of Taylor. We’re running background on him now. Second, some stockbroker who was on the scene with a victim. He says he didn’t see anything, but we haven’t pushed him yet.”
    “What about this Hack Nike?”
    “Well,” Calvin said, “since your source didn’t turn out to be so reliable, I haven’t followed it up yet.”
    “Get him.”
    “If we get funding, sure, I’ll—”
    “Now,” Jennifer said. “Get him.”
    “Before budget approval? Are you sure?”
    “Do I look sure?”
    “You look awful,” Calvin said, and laughed.

13 Billy
    Billy had been involved in some weird shit before, but this was right up there. The NRA had given them animal code names, so now he couldn’t even say howdy to someone without feeling like a dick. Some guys took straight to it, all, “Evening, Horse,” and, “Jackal, can that shit,” but Billy thought it was stupid. Billy was Mouse.
    He’d been out in the bush for three days, sleeping in ditches. He was wearing camouflage pants and a heavy jacket over a black T-shirt and carrying a slicker. He’d used that as a pillow last night, even when it started raining. This morning his smokes were too wet to light and his arms were so stiff he could hardly lift them.
    The NRA called it a war game, and it was meant to test his skills. So far it had only tested Billy’s patience. This was not skiing.
    “The flag’s gotta be close now,” Grizzly said. “Gotta be
real
close.”
    “We need that flag,” said Calf. She was the scariest-looking woman Billy had ever met. “I really want this job.”
    “What do you mean?” Billy said. “We’re already hired, right? I thought this was just training.”
    “Yeah,” Calf said. “The kind of training that costs you your job if you mess up.”
    “Oh,” Billy said. “Wow.”
    “Can the chatter!” Finch said, walking backward. “And stay tight!”
    Billy scowled. He’d had enough of Finch, the squad leader, too. If Finch said “chain of command” again, Billy was ready to pay out.
    They walked. The bush was much thicker now, almost a forest. There were weird-ass animals out here, Billy knew. Types of animals he’d never seen before. The idea spooked him.
    Something moved in the scrub to their left. The squad dropped to the ground. Billy raised his paintgun. It might not stop a charging bear, or rhino, or whatever the hell they had here, but if he aimed for the eyes—
    “Naw, lemme do it. You load it like this.”
    Voices. Finch gestured,
Fan out
. Billy didn’t think that was such a great idea; if they snapped twigs, they’d give themselves away. He looked at Finch questioningly.
    “Move,”
Finch hissed.
    He sighed. He and Drake took one flank, Grizzly and Calf the other. They made ten yards before either Grizzly or Calf snapped a branch and said, “Ahh, shit!”
    “
Go! Go!”
Finch shouted. “
Attack!”
    Billy ran, thinking this was really generous of Finch, yelling out to let the enemy know they were coming. He leapt over a fallen tree. Drake pounded behind him.
    They burst into a clearing, which had a red flag and a lot of NRA guys with red bands around their arms, and suddenly everyone was shooting paintballs. Drake caught a glob on his chest and sat down. Billy dived, rolled, and took up a position behind a tree. He globbed four enemies, fluidly shooting and reloading. Then Grizzly and Calf entered the clearing from the other side.
    “Take that, asshole!” Grizzly shouted, and pumped a paint round into a man who was already sitting down.
    “Behind you!” Billy yelled, but it was too late. Grizzly took one in the buttocks.
    “Son of a bitch,” said Grizzly.
    “Sit down, you moron,” the dead enemy said.
    Calf ran for a clutch of trees that was sheltering the remaining red soldier. He fired at her once, then ran. Calf was