Just Crazy by Andy Griffiths Read Free Book Online Page B

it?’
    â€˜Did you send me the card?’
    â€˜What card?’ I say, playing dumb.
    â€˜The Valentine’s card,’ she says.
    â€˜Oh, that card,’ I say, as casually as I can. ‘Yes, I did.’
    â€˜I thought so!’ she says.
    There’s an uncomfortable silence. I’m not sure what to say next.
    â€˜I wanted to thank you,’ she says.
    â€˜That’s okay,’ I say.
    â€˜No, I meant in person,’ she says. ‘I was wondering if we could meet tomorrow morning? Before school?’
    I can’t believe it! She’s practically asking me out on a date!
    â€˜Andy?’ she says. ‘Are you there?’

    No, I’m not here. I’m somewhere between the Earth and the moon I’m so happy. I have to try to come back. I have to answer her.
    â€˜Yes!’ I say. ‘I’m here. Where would you like to meet?’
    â€˜How about outside the park near the school?’ she says. ‘About 8.30?’
    â€˜Okay, Lisa,’ I say. I’m keen to get off the phone now before I say anything stupid. ‘See you then.’
    â€˜See you,’ she says. ‘And, Andy?’
    â€˜Yes?’ I say.
    â€˜It wasn’t a joke, was it?’
    â€˜What?’ I say.
    â€˜The card?’
    â€˜No!’ I say.
    â€˜Good,’ she says. ‘I’m really looking forward to it.’
    â€˜Me too,’ I say. I want to add, ‘because you’re beautiful and I love you’, but I can’t actually make the words because my mouth is just opening and closing like a fish’s.
    I hang up.
    I can’t believe it.
    The most beautiful girl in the world just rang up and asked me out on a date. What if she asks me to go out with her? Can she dothat? Can a girl ask a boy? I don’t see why not. What if she asks me to marry her? Can we do that? Are we old enough? Will I need a ring? Or does the one who asks have to give the ring? What if she asks me to kiss her? I’ve never kissed a girl before. Not really. Not on the lips. How do you do that? I’d better go and practise on my mirror.
    I don’t walk back up the stairs. I float.

    Lisa rang me.
    Lisa rang me and asked me out.
    She asked me out.
    I have to keep repeating it so that I can believe it.
    Lisa rang me.
    She asked me out.
    I didn’t ring her. She rang me. She must really like me after all. After everything bad that’s happened.
    I float into my room and flop onto my bed.
    She loves me.
    She loves me.
    I lie on my bed and think about tomorrow morning.
    I can see it now.
    I’m walking up the road to the park. I have a dozen roses in my arms.

    Lisa is standing there, looking beautiful.
    Everything around her is sort of blurry, like in one of those romantic photos they have in the front of photographers’ shops, but she is in the middle in perfect focus.
    She smiles and waves.
    â€˜Hi, Lisa,’ I say, in a deep, strong and confident voice.
    She looks into my eyes.
    I look into hers. I feel like I’m melting.
    â€˜Hi,’ she says in a voice so soft and beautiful that she sounds like an angel.
    I give her the roses.
    â€˜These are for you,’ I say.
    She looks at the roses. Her eyes fill with tears.
    â€˜They’re beautiful,’ she sobs. ‘Just beautiful . . .’
    â€˜Not as beautiful as you,’ I say, putting my arms around her.
    I bury my face in her soft perfumed hair — every strand shining like it’s spun from the finest gossamer.
    â€˜Oh, Andy,’ she says, ‘you are so thoughtful . . . so wonderful . . . so gentlemanly . . .’
    â€˜You forgot handsome,’ I say.
    â€˜And handsome,’ she says.
    â€˜And manly,’ I say.

    â€˜And manly,’ she says.
    â€˜And strong,’ I say.
    â€˜Be serious,’ she says.
    â€˜I was being serious,’ I say.
    She stares at me.
    â€˜Before we go any further I have to ask you a question,’ she