K-Pax by Gene Brewer Read Free Book Online Page A

e   will no t li e unde r sheet s o r   blankets-h e   fear s   the y   migh t wra p   themselve s   aroun d   hi s   throat-an d   h e   sleep s   on th e floo r s o a s no t   t o   fal l ou t   o f   be d   an d   brea k   hi s   neck .   A s   a   sor t   o f   compensation ,   perhaps ,   h e   sleeps quit e   soundl y   onc e   hi s   ritua l   i s   complete ,   thoug h   h e   awaken s   earl y   t o   fitfull y   chec k   hi s   parameter s   and accouterments , an d b y th e tim e h e ha s breakfas t i s hi s usua l nervou s wreck.

Ho w   coul d   a   perso n   ge t   s o   screwe d   up ?   Whe n   Erni e   wa s   a   bo y   o f   nin e   h e   watche d   hi s   mother chok e   t o   deat h   o n   a   piec e   o f   meat .   Unabl e   t o   help ,   h e   wa s   condemne d   t o   witnes s   he r   las t   agonizing moment s whil e hi s olde r   siste r   ra n   aroun d   th e   kitchen ,   screaming .   Befor e   h e   coul d   ge t   ove r   tha t   horrible experience , hi s fathe r du ga bom b shelte r i n th e   bac k   yar d   an d   practice d   usin g   it .   Here' s   ho w   i t   worked: A t an y   momen t   o f   th e   da y   o r   nigh t   Ernie' s   fathe r   woul d   suddenl y   lea p   a t   hi m   o r   emi t   a   blood-curdling screec h o r dous e hi m wit h   something .   Tha t   woul d   b e   th e   signa l   t o   ru n   fo r   th e   bom b   shelter .   B y   th e   time h e   wa s   eleve n   Erni e   wa s   unabl e   t o   spea k   o r   t o   sto p   shaking .   Whe n   h e   wa s   brough t   t o   MP I   i t   took month s   jus t   t o   ge t   hi m   no t   t o   jum p   an d   ru n   wheneve r   a   doo r   opene d   o r   someon e   sneezed .   Tha t   was nearl y twent y year s ago , an d   h e   ha s   bee n   her e   eve r   since .   Hi s   father ,   incidentally ,   i s   a   patien t   a t   another institution ; hi s siste r committe d suicid e i n 1980.
    Fortunately ,   debilitatin g   phobia s   lik e   Ernie' s   ar e   rare .   Thos e   wh o   ar e   afrai d   o f   snakes ,   fo r   example, nee d onl y sta y   awa y   fro m   fores t   an d   field .   Agoraphobic s   an d   claustrophobic s   ca n   usuall y   avoi d   crowds an d elevator s and , i n an y case , ar e treatabl e wit h drug s o r b y slo w acclimatio n   t o   th e   offendin g   situation. Bu t ho w doe s on e acclimat e th e necrophobic ? Ho w t o avoi d th e Gri m Reaper?
    Howi e   i s   forty-three ,   thoug h   h e   look s   t o   b e   sixty .   Bor n   int o   a   poo r   Brookly n   family ,   hi s   musical abilitie s becam e eviden t earl y on . Hi s fathe r gav e hi m hi s unuse d violi n whe n h e wa s fou r year s ol d and , in hi s earl y   teens ,   h e   playe d   tha t   instrumen t   wit h   a   numbe r   o f   well-respecte d   regiona l   orchestras .   A s   time wen t   on ,   however ,   h e   performe d   les s   an d   les s   frequently ,   preferrin g   instea d   t o   stud y   scores ,   other instruments , th e histor y o f music . Hi s father ,a bookseller , wa s no t particularl y concerne d   wit h   thi s   tur n   of event s   an d   wen t   abou t   hi s   tin y   sho p   braggin g   tha t   Howi e   wa s   goin g   t o   becom e   a   famou s   conductor, anothe r   Stokowski .   Bu t   b y   th e   tim e   Howi e   go t   t o   colleg e   hi s   interest s   seeme d   t o   cove r   th e   entire spectru m   o f   huma n   endeavor .   H e   trie d   t o   maste r   everythin g   fro m   algebr a   t o   Zen .   H e   studie d   nigh t   and da y unti l h e finall y brok e dow n an d ende d u p wit h us.
    A s   soo n   a s   hi s   physica l   healt