Keesha's House by Helen Frost Read Free Book Online Page B

might come close
    to being right, but what? After the funeral, I walked
    out ahead of Stephie, and when I looked
    back, I saw Steph reach out, heard her say to Keesha, He …
    then stop and step back. That one word, he ,
    was more than Keesha could hear. It was like she was wearing
    some kind of invisible shield. Stephie looked
    like she was trying hard to think of what to say,
    but, like me, she couldn’t. Keesha walked
    away and got into a car. A guy closed
    the car door and drove off. Who’s that, that closed
    the door? I asked, and Stephie said, That’s Joe. He
    owns the house. Later we went for a long walk
    down by the river, and she told me more about the house where
    Keesha and some other kids live on their own. Don’t say
    anything to any grownups , Stephie said. Look ,
    I said, they shouldn’t have to do this! Look
    at all the agencies set up to help. It’s a closed
    subject to Stephie. She promised Keesha not to say
    anything, especially about Joe. He knows some people think he
    should report the kids, but he’s not going to. It’s wearing
    on me, thinking about them, and then about Tobias Walker.
    At least Joe doesn’t close his door and walk away. He does what he
    can. It looks to me like the kids at Keesha’s house are wearing
    lives designed for people twice their age. But what, if anything, should I say?

A GOOD PERSON      KEESHA
    When we were little kids, Tobias liked to hide
    and make me try to find him. He was good
    at hiding; he never made a sound
    to give himself away. Sometimes I’d keep
    looking for a long time before I’d see
    some small movement, and then his little grin. I can still
    see it. Tonight I have to make myself sit still
    and not look everywhere he could be hiding,
    hoping I might find him. If I could just see
    him one last time, smiling that good-
    natured smile—if I could say goodbye—I might not keep
    thinking he’s alive somewhere. I might not jump at every sound,
    thinking it’s my brother calling me. Now it sounds
    like Joe’s home. I’m surprised he’s still
    letting me stay here, after what I did last night. I keep
    expecting—I don’t even know. What happens if I don’t always hide
    the way I’m feeling? Joe’s gotta be a good
    man to stand by and see
    me lose control that bad and still see
    something good in me. It all started with the sound
    of that red cup breaking on the kitchen floor. It felt good
    to hear it break. I dropped another cup and then another, and it still
    felt good. Threw three plates on the floor and didn’t try to hide
    the pieces. Felt like, if I could keep
    on breaking dishes, maybe I could keep
    myself from breaking. I wonder—who did Joe see
    when he walked in? I didn’t even try to hide
    what I was doing, and by that time, some sound
    was coming out of me. I still
    don’t know where it got started—it felt good
    and awful all at once. Joe grabbed my wrists, held them. You are a good
    person, Keesha. It’s okay. You just keep
    on cryin’. Was I crying? I held still
    then and let Joe hold me. I let him see
    me cry, let him hear that ugly sound.
    Didn’t even try to hide.
    Maybe Tobias used to keep on hiding
    just to hear the sound of me still looking.
    Tonight I see how getting found feels good.

READY TO TRY AGAIN      DONTAY
    Only three days after I got to Keesha’s house,
    we heard what happened to Tobias. I never
    felt so scared. I don’t even want
    to know who did it, or when, or how,
    or why. Just wanna keep my distance
    from the whole mess. It could
    be me, buried six feet deep, and Tobias could
    be sleepin’ on this couch in Keesha’s house.
    Seems like, sometimes, ain’t no distance
    between life and death, even if you never
    mean to go that way. Keesha started sayin’ how
    I should find out if my foster parents want
    me back. She’d say, You should call, at