Maggie for Hire by Kate Danley Read Free Book Online

have his two attackers covered, so I figured I’d take the other two.
    The fat man just sat there and watched.  Asshole.
    “Four against two?  Come on,” I said.
    “I suppose I could make it five, but then it would not be sporting.”
    A chair came sailing by my head, missing me by inches and clocking the other bad dude who was trying to sneak up behind me in the face.  I followed through with a one-two punch to his jaw and in a matter of seconds he was on the ground with little tweetie birds circling.
    “You okay, Killian?”
    “Managing fairly well...”
    He looked like he might be breaking a sweat, so since I was done with the one guy, I had enough time to strategically land a Doc Marten in a kneecap of another.
    The bad guy crumpled with a cry and Killian finished him off with a foot to the nose.
    “Maggie!” Killian cried, rolling over my back beer barrel polka style to nail Thing Three, who was coming at me with a sharp pointy object.
    “Come on, fat man.  We’re not trying to permanently hurt anyone here.  It’s just a conversation until someone loses an eye,” I said as I sparred with my attacker, who wasn’t going down as easily as the other guys.
    “Perhaps if you talked less, you would not be having your current troubles.”
    “Perhaps if you just told us where Ulrich MacKay was, I would buy you a beer and we could call it a day.”
    “I am afraid anyone who knows the name of Ulrich is not someone I would be breaking a fast with.”
    “Breaking a fast... hold on.”  Nobody talks all old skool without a reason.  “Are you a fucking elf?”
    “It is amazing what modern day plastic surgery on Earth is capable of, is it not?  The doctor took just a little off the top,” the fat man said as he showed off his rounded ears.
    “Did you notice,” punch “that I,” roundhouse “am working with an elf?” a jab to a left cross .
    Total knock out.
    Killian sat down to catch his breath as I took on our final opponent.
    “You could help,” I said as the guy caught a glancing blow across my chin that could have rung my bell if my dancing skills weren’t so sharp.
    “We must win honorably, man-to-man, without stooping to the tactics of our enemy.  I am going to procure a water.”  He walked through the door and pointed a finger at the fat man.  “Anything?”
    “I am without need.”
    And that fucking fairy walked out to go buy some water from the fucking barista.
    “Are you fucking kidding me?”
    Killian was back, “I shall leave yours on the table over here.”
    I landed the final earth shattering blow and stepped over the guy’s body to grab the water angrily, “Really?”
    Killian placed a calming hand upon my forearm, “Really.”  He looked at the fat man, “You have seen that we fought fairly without deceit.  The rules of engagement would dictate you owe us each a bounty.”
    Point for the elf.  I didn’t know there was a random set of secret rules that could win us some favors.
    “Indeed.  You have bested my champions,” the fat man replied, as the inked dude brought him a dainty cup of tea.  Of course he would be a fucking tea drinker.
    I wasn’t any good with setting contracts with fairy folk, so I turned to my partner, “Killian, ask him for something.”
    Killian pulled out a piece of paper, wrote down my number, and handed it to the fat man, “You are hereby bound to call us immediately with any news of Ulrich MacKay or his whereabouts until the time we deem it fit to cease.”
    Killian was good.
    The fat man nodded his head in acquiescence, “Ulrich has unbalanced the power here.  His trade runs have cut into my territory.  I would be pleased to assist in... dissuading him... from his current business plan.”
    I pushed Killian out of the way, “The only dissuading is going to be me punching you in the face.  Why did you tell your goons to attack us if we’re on the same side?!?  Friend of my enemy and all!”
    “You did not say that you were