explore all of the sexual fantasies swirling around in his head.
He wanted to run for the door and escape the closed expression on Donovan’s face, to take back the last few hours and pretend that they never happened. He wanted to be blissfully ignorant of the fact that he couldn’t live in the closet anymore because his mate was a man.
He was suddenly anxious to escape from Donovan’s disturbing presence, from the feelings of longing he created. To his dismay, his voice broke slightly when he spoke. “Was there something else you wanted, Donovan?”
“I’m not—I’m not very good at this, Jim.”
Jim’s mind was congested with doubts and fears. He looked away hastily then moved restlessly. Perhaps it was simply his own uneasiness, but Jim suddenly wondered if Donovan was being totally truthful with him.
“Good at what?” He said the words tentatively as if testing the idea. He took a step back in confusion when Donovan let out a bitter little laugh.
“Besides the whole I’m waiting for my mate thing, there’s a reason I don’t have a girlfriend right now, Jim,” Donovan said as he released Jim’s arm only to shove his hand through his light-brown hair. His voice was deceptively calm as he continued. “I don’t do relationships, Jim. It’s too messy. And I basically suck at them.”
When Jim spoke, his voice was tender, almost a murmur. “And you think I’m any better? I’ve been avoiding getting involved with a woman all of my adult life. And that has nothing to do with waiting for my mate.”
“The whole living in the closet thing?” Donovan asked as he sat down on the side of the bed and looked up at Jim.
Jim nodded, feeling his face heat up. “I watched what Joe went through when he came out, how people changed toward him, and I never wanted to go through that. So, I chose not to.”
Donovan burst out laughing. “That came around to bite you in the ass, didn’t it?”
Jim didn’t know how to reply to Donovan’s words without hurting his feelings or sounding like a complete goober, so he didn’t say anything. He just nodded his head in agreement. Keeping his mouth shut seemed to work so much better for him anyway.
“If you’ve decided to accept me,” Donovan said as he looked down at the bottle of lube in his hand, “how do you plan on avoiding that? I’m pretty sure people are going to figure it out, Jim, because I refuse to live in the closet with you.”
“How about my place then? Will you live there with me?” Jim asked cautiously. He could feel Donovan’s eyes on him, watching him, measuring him.
“So, I’m just supposed to give up my place and my position in my pack to move here and live with you?” Donovan asked. “Why don’t you move to my pack?”
Jim closed his eyes and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as he tried to rein in his growing anger. He felt like Donovan wasn’t giving in an inch. Jim opened his eyes and looked at Donovan, hoping he had beat down his anger enough to not sound like he was attacking Donovan. “Okay, then we’ll live with your pack.”
“You’re serious.” Donovan sounded astonished.
Jim couldn’t figure out why.
“Why are you so surprised?” Jim asked in confusion.
Donovan’s hands slammed into the mattress beside him. “Jim, you’re talking about giving up your life here, your friends, your family, even your job just to move to my pack and live with me. Why would you do that?”
“Because you’re my mate?” Jim asked, bewildered. Mates were meant to be together. Weren’t they? Did Donovan plan on them being mates and living in separate packs? Did he even plan on them being mates?
“Jim, I’m a man.”
Jim tilted his head to one side as he gazed at Donovan, a slight smirk on his face. “That was kind of hard to miss.”
“If we live together, if we claim each other, you’re going to have to admit that you’re gay. I refuse to pretend we’re just roommates or friends. I’ll want to live with
Alexandra Ivy, Laura Wright