maâam,â the agent said kindly.
Ten minutes later, the agent was saying something about a first-class lounge while handing me my ticket. I passed through security without a hitch, found my gate, and collapsed into a seat. It was at that moment that reality hit.
What am I doing?
Was I really about to get on a plane to Italy? With my elbows on my knees, I buried my face in my hands. Where should I even start looking for Gil? Was I expecting him to be waiting for me at the hotel in Bologna? Or maybe heâd be at the corner café drinking an espresso and eating a pastry? Tiff was right; this was crazy. I didnât speak any Italian and, so far, everything Gil had told me was a lie. I was embarking on what was already feeling like a wild-goose chase.
I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. I was here now. Wild-goose chase or not, I couldnât turn back. If I had to chart a course with the geese in Italy, so be it. My best option seemed to be the bank account. I could look up where and when he made withdrawals and trace his steps that way. I didnât want to pull that up in the airport terminal so I decided the privacy of my hotel room in Bologna would be best.
I pulled out my phone and found that I could take a train from Rome to Bologna, about two hours away. I didnât know where the train terminal was from the airport, but it couldnât be far. The distance from the station to the hotel in Bologna was another question, but I was sure Iâd be able to hail a taxi.
I looked at my ticket and read the words First Class on it again. As if the whole experience wasnât surreal enough. I, who had sworn off flying forever, was not only flying, but flying first class. I felt guilty, but Gil and I had agreed that we would use the settlement money for things that were incredibly important, and I couldnât think of anything more important than finding him.
Gate D30 had only a few people milling around, but the terminal was bustling with travelers. Down the hallway, I spotted people going in and out of what looked like a secret club. It was a large, heavy-looking wooden door. Suddenly, I remembered the ticket agent telling me I had plenty of time to relax in the lounge. I felt awkward, but my curiosity got the best of me so I got up and made my way to the American Airlines Business/First Class Lounge. I walked straight in like I knew what I was doing.
The attendant checked my ticket and told me to enjoy the complimentary food and beverages. There was even a bar with a bartender. I filled a plate with some miniâhot dogs, cheese, crackers, and baby carrots. I got a can of Coke from the bartender and chose a plush leather chair in the far corner of the room where I could watch people come and go and eat my snacks in peace.
A few men came in and made a beeline for the bar. They all ordered bourbon and loosened their ties as they sat down. I couldnât tell if they were together or not, but they seemed friendly with one another from the handshaking and smiles that were going around. I watched them for a few minutes before focusing on the bartender.
He was a good-looking guy, probably in his late twenties, early thirties, cordial and friendly with everyone he spoke to, including me. His personality put me at ease. Something about him made me feel like I wasnât the only one in the room who ate off-brand mac and cheese and PB&Js for dinner more than once a week. He caught me looking at him and smiled. I smiled back. Nothing flirtatious, but it did make me think of Chad. I quickly dismissed that thought and focused on food and people-watching.
One of the men pulled out a deck of cards and invited the others to play blackjack. He then proceeded to cheat his ass off. He won all but three of the twelve rounds, and only because he gifted the wins to the three other guys. By the time they were done, Five Card Stud had more drinks coming to him than he deserved.
I was enjoying the snacks