Postcards to America by Patrick Ingle Read Free Book Online Page A

then got up and adjusted the hands.
    ‘Now will you give me your “crotch”, he asked again.
    ‘No.’
    Dr. Myers shook his head and made a note in his notebook. ‘Let’s move on,’ the psychiatrist suggested. ‘Tell me about your “wildhood”.’
    ‘My “wildhood”.’
    ‘Have you a problem with your “rearing”.
    “Punctual” Mary guessed he meant hearing. ‘No. I do not have a problem with my hearing.’
    Dr. Myers removed his glasses and gave them a wipe to remove non-existing dirt. “Are you ‘pussy”, he asked, about the “crime” keeping of your friends?’
    ‘Punctual” Mary wondered where her “pussy” fitted into the scheme of things. Her “pussy” felt OK.
    “Pussy?” “Punctual” Mary asked.
    Dr. Myers toyed with his medallion and looked at the ceiling. “Pussy”, “pussy”, “pussy”, he repeated.
    “Punctual” Mary felt at a loss to understand the doctor’s meaning. Then it dawned on her. He meant fussy. What we need here is a translator, she thought.
    ‘I do not select my friends because of their time-keeping,’ “Punctual” Mary answered. ‘If they choose to be late then so be it. I just tell them that if they are not there at the appointed time then I will be gone. Group meetings are obviously different because people will be arriving at different times.’
    Dr. Myers tried another tack. ‘Tell me about your early “ways”.
    This time “Punctual” Mary grasped the doctor’s meaning instantly. He wanted her to tell him about her childhood. Uneventful would be the best way to describe her early years. “Punctual” Mary relaxed…
    Her childhood came near to being perfect. An only child, her days were filled with the love her parents showered on her. She went to good schools and teachers marked her down as a reasonably clever student. She made friends easily enough and for some reason, bullies paid her no attention. English, her favourite subject, led her into a wondrous world of literature and exploration.
    “Punctual” Mary’s father worked wonders with his hands. They said that he could fix anything that moved. He started with radios then moved on to clocks and watches. Neighbours would bring in clocks and watches to be repaired. Clocks would be strewn on tables, on the floor and in every available free space. “Punctual” Mary grew up to the sound of the clocks ticking. Not only would they be ticking but ticking at different frequencies.
    “Punctual” Mary would often watch her father at work. He would strip the watch or clock and lay the pieces on a sheet of white paper. Some of the pieces were so tiny she could barely see them. Minute cogs and springs so small that she marvelled how they could ever be reassembled.
    ‘Time is precious. Use it wisely.’ Her father told her this repeatedly. ‘We only have so much of it.’ His second piece of advice, which he stressed with equal force: ‘People who you have never met previously will judge you on your punctuality.’
    Later her father went into partnership. Together the two partners opened a shop selling and fixing clocks and watches with a sideline in jewellery. After several years, her father bought out his partner.
    So she went on to university and on graduation started a career in banking. While at university she met and dated several boys and really fancied only two. Then Liam came along…They both met at a nightclub where Liam worked as a bouncer. She felt instantly attracted to him and after the usual chat up lines went back to his flat. Liam proved that night that he could certainly bounce her.
    “Punctual” Mary finished her story. She felt too comfortable so she moved her body.
    Dr. Myers finished scribbling and l ooked at her. ‘Does your obsession with “crime” affect your sex life?
    She closed her eyes. Was she really obsessed? Did her preoccupation with time amount to an obsession? Perhaps it did. And did it affect her sex life? She reminded herself of her last time with