Science...For Her! by Megan Amram Read Free Book Online Page A

the mnemonic, but it’s the only way to remember. NEVER FORGET! I didn’t make that phrase up, I stole it from 9/11. :)
    Get back on track, Meg! No one has ever called me Meg, but that’s my nickname for myself when I have to give myself a slap on the wrist. “Finish your chapter, Meg!” “Go to spin class,Meg!” “Stop peeing in the bed when you’re drunk, Meg!” “You don’t know me, Meg, I’m going to pee wherever I want.” “Meg, I’m sorry, but you are just being out of line.” “That’s it, Meg, I’m going to pee on you.” And then I wet my pants and go to bed. Animals are an amazing part of the world we live in. My favorite animal is the fly, because its name is what it does.
    Animals are so lucky, they get to wear animal prints at all times! Take a look at this little feature, the most fun animal prints.
    Most Fun Animal Prints
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    Zebra

    Marissa

    Tiger
    There are so many animals that it’s going to be hard to cover everything, but I’m going to try to get all the really important kit-kits and fishies in there!
Land Animals
    OMG, there are SO MANY GOOD ONES ON LAND!! Um, ever heard of lions? Deer, much?

Air Animals
    OMG, while I was writing the “land animals” section I TOTALLY FORGOT I had this treat coming up!! And then now this is like a fun surprise! It’s like when you leave five bucks in your skinny jeans from last season and then you put them on again and you have the five bucks in your pocket and you also lost a little weight so they look amazing and you love love !
    My favorite air animals are birds!!!

Swimming Animals
    Fishies, whale-ies, sharkypoos! Also, tadpoles! OMG!

Evolution
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    The time was late 1831. The place was England. Let me take you back: there was tea in the kettle, the 1832 calendars were coming out and going on sale for next year, slaves were at an all-time high, 1831 calendars were at an all-time low!
    A young man named Charles Darwin was sailing around the Galapagos Islands in a boat called the HMS Beagle (how cute is THAT, a hot twenty-two-year-old in a boat called the BEAGLE !) and he observed that the cute little finches (oh my God, this is too cute!!!! brb I have to go JERK OFF) had developed changes that made them better suited to their environments, called adaptations (FYI, back! Got a quick jerk sesh in! Thought about fat Val Kilmer the whole time, how weird is that!).
    Darwin realized that those birds more suited to the Galapagos environment were more likely to survive and pass their genes and traits on to their offspring. This is called natural selection and is a huge part of biological evolution . If a species doesn’t change, it becomes extinct , like the dinosaurs or huge seventies bushes. Like, here’s an example. Girls that are shaved clean in their DOWNTOWN DISNEY like a newborn baby with alopecia (disease where all your hair falls out—sign me up, please, no more waxing, baby! Do I make you horny, baby!! ;)) are more likely to mate and then pass on their genes than girls with big ol’ tufts of hair. Then the shaved girls’ babies will all be shaved as well because they’ll have inherited the trait, and then the species will have evolved to all have hairless Beasts of the Southern Wild (vaginas).
    This fun magazine chart will help your lady-brain grasp the concept of evolution! FIG. 1.21
    FIG. 1.21
    Evolution of Bushes
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    CAVEMAN BUSH
    Covered the whole body. Was less of a bush and more of a grassland.
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    MEDIEVAL BUSH
    Covered entire lower body. Sometimes you would look down there and you would just have whole turkey legs caught in your bush. And then you could eat it at a later feast.
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    ROARING TWENTIES BUSH
    Bushes—and skirts—were shorter. Sometimes the bush would poke out below the fringe of the flapper skirts.
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    EARLY TWO THOUSANDS BUSH
    George W. BUSH! Haha, just a little political humor for ya! Not only did Bush leave in 2008, but BUSHES left in 2008!
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    GAME OF THRONES BUSH (CIRCA 2014)
    Has since