Secrets of the Heart by Jillian Kent Read Free Book Online

quite well the true essence of her being. “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”
    “It’s dull.” Grace lightly brushed a finger down her daughter’s dark tresses. “It does nothing for this gorgeous head of hair or your beautiful hazel eyes. Please change. Why don’t you wear that beautiful lilac silk gown that makes your eyes sparkle?”
    “Mother! Father bought that gown in London for my birthday.” Tears stung her eyes. “I want to save it for a special occasion.”
    “This is a special occasion.” Grace wagged a finger. “Madeline Elizabeth Whittington, life is an adventure. Start living it.”
    Madeline gritted her teeth. “I am trying, Mother.”
    “Good.” Grace took a deep breath. “Now, go change into something else. If you don’t want to wear the lilac dress, please choose another. Hally can help you pick something more appropriate for the evening.”
    Madeline retired to her room. “Lord Vale, indeed,” she muttered to herself as she jerked open her wardrobe and pulled out the black crepe funeral gown she had worn far too often in the past. “Lord Vale is a… a… horse’s backside.” Holding the dress in front of her, she looked at her image in the gold cheval mirror. She deemed her choice appropriate, very appropriate. She did not need anyone’s help. Black suited her mood just fine.
    A soft knock on the door interrupted her musings. “Who is it?” Madeline asked irritably, throwing the gown over a nearby chair.
    The door creaked open. A cheerful face peered cautiously around it. “I take it this is not a good time?”
    “Hally!” Madeline ran to the door, grabbed her friend by the hand, and pulled her inside. “Thank God it’s you. I hoped it wasn’t Mother coming after me with more advice.”
    Hally squeezed her hand. “What’s wrong? You look as though you’ve been asked to dance by the shortest man at the ball.”
    “Just thinking, but it’s unimportant.” Madeline shook off the feeling of dread that kept niggling at her mind. “We’ll talk later.”
    “Are you certain?” Hally asked.
    “Yes.” She took a breath and refocused her thoughts, making a conscious effort to abandon her worries. Madeline admired the yellow gown that showed off her friend’s hourglass figure to perfection. “You look splendid.” Hally’s black hair, bound up with matching yellow ribbons, captured the light, and her sky-blue eyes brimmed with enthusiasm.
    “I thought I looked a bit too much like a blooming daffodil.”
    “How is it you can always make me laugh when I am so far from being happy?”
    Hally’s eyes lit with amusement. “Maybe because laughing has nothing to do with being happy. It’s a tool to help you find your way there. Pretend enough, and you may actually find you have arrived.”
    Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Madeline changed the subject abruptly. “What do you think of Lord Vale?”
    Hally sat near her, careful not to jar Madeline’s injured arm. “His presence vexes you more than I imagined it would.” She looked thoughtful. “I’ve never met him, but I understand from the gossips that he is a respectable lord with a talent for business. I’ve never heard rumors of him gambling or drinking or carrying on, as some do in his position. Lord Selby, for instance. What do you think of him?”
    “I don’t know. I can’t think of him at all without thinking of my father. I know I’m not being fair to Lord Vale or to my mother, but I simply cannot help it.”
    “After James died, I felt the same way,” Hally said gently. “I’d lost the only man I thought I would ever love. I could not imagine anyone taking his place. Surely you remember. But time does heal all wounds, my dear, if we allow them to be healed rather than dwelling on them and allowing them to fester. I finally had to accept his loss and come to an understanding of God and the real world.”
    “The real world,” Madeline said. “Sometimes I’d like nothing better than to