Sing by Vivi Greene Read Free Book Online Page B

asks, apparently reading a new shadow on my face.
    â€œI just don’t know what the point is anymore.” I sigh, nibbling at the corner of my sunflower seed muffin.
    â€œThe point of what?” Sam asks.
    â€œWhy am I even trying to pretend like I can escape?” I ask. “Everyone in this room knows that I’ve just had my heart broken. If they’re not talking about it, they’re thinking about it. And we’re on an island with no chain restaurants and a video rental store that still carries actual videos. Do you have any idea how messed up that feels?”
    Sammy opens her mouth and I know she’s going to say something to cheer me up, the way she always does, but I keep talking. It feels like if I don’t get it all out, the way I’ve been feeling, the uneasy sensation in my chest might get stuck, swelling and spreading until it crushes me completely.
    â€œI’m so sick of the drama. And I hate that everyone expects me to roll over and turn every crappy thing that happens to me into a song. What if I don’t want to writeabout getting my heart broken for the fifteenth time? What if I don’t want to write a love song at all?”
    We’re all quiet for a few moments, until Sammy clears her throat. “Are you saying you want to stop singing?”
    â€œNo,” I huff. “I just wish I could figure out a way to write about something that isn’t Jed.”
    â€œSo do it,” Tess says simply. She’s always doing this, making me feel like I’m overcomplicating things, like if I didn’t spend so much time in my head, if I could get out of my own way, everything would be so much easier. I watch her stir sugar into her coffee. I watch Sammy break her scone into tiny, uniform pieces. I feel a sudden, empty sadness. These are my best friends, the people who know me better than anyone else in the universe. If they don’t understand how hard this is, how can I ever expect anyone else to?
    My phone buzzes on the table. I lean over to glance at the caller ID. Tess and Sammy do, too. It’s Jed.
    My stomach drops, and I snatch the phone up. “Don’t answer it,” Sammy blurts.
    It’s the first time he’s called since I left. The first time that I know about, anyway. I received the FedExed phone from Terry almost immediately, but I waited a day before activating it, and now I can’t stop staring at it, willing every vibrating alert to mean a message from Jed. I quickly scan my memory of his schedule,wondering where he is. London? Spain? What time is it there? Is he alone?
    â€œShe’s right,” Tess says. “What could he possibly say that would make you feel better?”
    I think about it, my fingers clutching the phone’s smooth sides. Even if he says he was wrong, that he’s made a mistake, he wants me back, it won’t change the fact that he talked to the press and made me look like a whiny, needy, lovesick little girl.
    I drop the phone and watch as it shudders across the table. It finally stops its tortuous buzzing and we wait to see if he leaves a message. The screen goes dark. He doesn’t.
    I swallow, my jaw clenched, a throbbing pressure behind my eyes. Every part of me wishes I could hear his voice, ask him about his shows, tell him all about the island and how much he’d love it. It’s like my brain has been reprogrammed, but my body, my heart, are still stuck. Even after the way things ended, all I can think about is the way we used to be, a time—not so long ago—when my days weren’t complete until I shared them with him. There’s a tiny part of me that feels like this whole thing is truly just vacation, and when I get back to New York, I’ll return to my old life, my old routine. And Jed.
    I feel Sammy’s and Tess’s eyes on me as I stare at the phone. Tess pulls her own out of her pocket and checksthe time. “We’re late,” she says