Sleepers by Megg Jensen Read Free Book Online Page A

There were few places I could go without being seen. Blending in was beyond my skills. However, I had mastered the fake smile well.
    There was one place in Fithia I could go where no one could find me.
    As soon as I passed the castle gates, I broke into a run. I felt my body relax into a rhythm as my shoes pounded the grass below me, my fists gripping the rough fabric of my dress. I’d been this way many times before and I weaved in and out of the birch trees, never missing a step. Their bark peeled, revealing layers of black beneath the white, reminding me of my feelings. Pure on top, but now so riddled with darkness underneath.
    After a few minutes of running at a steady pace, I came to a clearing not far beyond the tree line and slowed to a stop. The carpeted grove with small yellow flowers growing from the groundcover smelled like Trevin when he came out of the bath. So clean, so pure, so untouched. I smiled, for real, for the first time since waking up.
    The anger remained, but I was down there too. It hadn’t overtaken me. Mags would have been thrilled to see the smile on my face.
    I stood still, feet shoulder width apart, knees slightly bent. My arms hung at my sides, bent at the elbows. I rested my wrists just above my hips, hands in a fist, and I lowered into a lunge.
    When I first began practicing meditation, my muscles would burn with the strain of holding my body still. Now they relaxed into a position they’d become more than comfortable with. My breath flowed in through my nose and out through my mouth. My eyes fluttered closed and all the muscles in my face relaxed.
    I held this pose for fifty breaths, relaxing more with each exhale.
    For years Kellan wondered how I was able to hold myself so steady during sparring. He’d never learned how to relax when Aric taught us basic meditation. In fact, Kellan’s continual squirming and inability to sit still forced Aric to give up completely. But I’d continued my practice every day in private until I’d mastered it.
    Meditation was my advantage, my secret weapon. If an opponent couldn’t ruffle me, I couldn’t lose. Between two warriors of equal skill, mental control tipped the balance. A warrior who controlled her emotions and her breath always won, never giving in to the feint.
    I punched my right fist and stepped forward with my right foot. Moving into the sequence brought me even greater peace and clarity. I’d learned this early too. Kellan had given up. It was another advantage I had over him. It wasn’t just my control over my emotions, but my control over my whole body. Aric told us when we were children that learning these moves would make us better warriors. I was the only one who’d believed him, but I didn’t tell him. I practiced in secret, in my hidden grove, for years until I had it right.
    I’d never been beaten in a fight since.
    The motions were second nature to me now. A punch combined with a step. A hand sliced through the air like a knife while spinning the opposite direction. It was the dance of the warrior and I knew all the steps.
    Normally my practice helped clear my mind. No problem was too big to be solved during active meditation. But today proved different.
    Executing a punch always led me directly to the next move, but instead of turning I stepped forward with my left foot. I stopped, losing the concentration I’d practiced so many years to perfect. Bringing myself back to center, back to the beginning of my meditation, I tried again.
    Right punch. Right foot forward. Punch to the side while spinning to the right.
    Again, failure. My feet tangled up as I spun the wrong direction. Losing my balance, I fell to the ground. I punched the soft grass. Tears spilled again. I’d cried more today than in the last year.
    If I couldn’t calm myself on the inside, how could I calm myself on the outside? The two worked together and right now my emotions were a mess.
    I blamed the Awakening. While I’d felt clarity at first, I