Something to Believe In (The Renegade Saints Book 4) by Ella Fox Read Free Book Online Page A

at Cole as he held up the power cord and smirked at me like a giant prick.
    I stepped down from the machine, elbowing Gavin out of my way as I crossed the room and grabbed a hand towel to mop the sweat off my face and neck. My breath was coming in bursts as I spun back and faced them both.
    “Seriously,” I huffed, “you’re fuckin’ tag-teaming me today ? I’m not ready for this, man.”
    “We all know the only way to get answers when you shut down like this is to corner you,” Gavin said dryly.
    Cole nodded his head in agreement.
    “Answers about what?”
    “Don’t play dumb. You know very fuckin’ well what,” Cole retorted.
    I wasn’t in the fucking mood. I didn’t think I’d ever be in the mood, but right then I wasn’t even in the vicinity of being chill enough to deal. I’d been running for over an hour and the supposed runners’ high hadn’t kicked in. So much for the endorphin rush making me feel better.
    I narrowed my eyes as I addressed Cole. “Thought you weren’t a talk show host,” I lashed out defensively. “Looks to me like you couldn’t wait to go rat me out.”
    He crossed his arms over his chest and rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t have said shit, but Daisy walked back into the downstairs area looking like her blood had turned to ice and you stomped out of the bathroom after her like it was on fire. You had to know Gavin of all people was going to pick up on it. When he asked me, it wasn’t like I could lie.”
    “That’s fuckin’ rich,” I sniped. “When you were keeping Devon a secret you had no problem lying. Why did you have the option and I don’t?”
    He had the wisdom to look chastised. “You’ve got a point,” he conceded. “But we both know I was wrong in that situation. I should’ve said something earlier.”
    His agreeing with me mostly took the wind out of my sails, argument wise. I couldn’t very well make it about him if he was taking responsibility. I took a few deep breaths and rolled my head back and forth to release some tension. I was so keyed up and tense my shoulders were damn near meeting my ears.
    “Fine,” I said as calmly as I could. “What is it you want to know?”
    “What is it you want to tell us?” Gavin countered.
    “I want to tell you nothing,” I said honestly. “I’d love to shove it all down and bury it deep.”
    “’Cause we all know how well that works,” Cole interjected.
    “I get you,” I assured him. “The truth is I don’t know what the fuck to say. I knew from the moment I met her my reaction to her wasn’t normal. I’ve done my best to stay away from her. Obviously, last night I fuckin’ blew that to hell,” I ground out.
    “It’s not a crime to like someone,” Gavin said calmly.
    “You know how I—”
    He cut me off. “Yeah, I do know. But I also know something is different about Daisy for you. I’ve known since day one. The way you look at her, man. It’s like how Cole looks at Devon, Flynn looks at Tessa, and I look at Leah. You want her. And I don’t mean you want her like you’re going to fuck once and roll out. If that were the case, you wouldn’t be so amped up.”
    “Different isn’t good for me,” I countered.
    Cole’s hand slashed through the air dismissively. “You’re clinging so desperately to an old belief system,” he said. “If anyone gets where you’re coming from, it’s me. I held onto my own like it was a life raft. It was stupid and a complete waste of time. Being with Devon is the best thing I’ve ever done.”
    “I know what you’re saying, but it’s different for me. What went on with you and Devon isn’t comparable. She never had to put up with you being a complete fuckin’ whack job.”
    “You’re not whacked,” he said firmly. “There isn’t a damn thing wrong with you.”
    I twisted my fingers around the towel I’d used to wipe down with. “I’m a grown ass man who can’t sleep in the same fuckin’ room with anyone. That’s pretty goddamn fucked