Stork Naked by Piers Anthony Read Free Book Online

severely. “If the reality we need turns out to be one of the banned ones.”
    “Hey, you forgot me,” the peeve said.
    “A talking bird!” the stork said, startled.
    “You talk, baby-brain!”
    “We don't deliver birds, so you are not listed.”
    “Then how do you get baby storks, pinhead?”
    “We summon the Man who brings the incipient egg, of course.”
    Then another stork flew to the office. This was Stymy; Surprise recognized him by the marks of the spectacles he wore when reading. “You summoned me?”
    “Talk with these folk,” the office stork said. “So they will go away.”
    “Where did you take my baby?” Surprise demanded.
    Stymy blinked. “I don't deliver centaurs.”
    “I am Surprise Golem, transformed for now to centaur form. It's my talent. The supervisor will review my case and verify that I am really eighteen years old. Meanwhile, we have to recover my baby. Where did you take it?”
    “I'm not sure I am allowed to divulge such information.”
    Surprise glanced at the office stork. “Tell him to cooperate with us.”
    A fluorescent bulb flashed over the office stork's head, the kind that denoted a quirky but effective notion. “I will do better than that. I will assign him to your mission so you will all go away.”
    “All we need is the information,” Che said.
    “I can't tell you,” Stymy said. “I will have to show you.”
    “Why can't you tell me?”
    “Because the fissure closed up and there is no longer a direct route there. But I will know it when I see it.”
    “Good enough,” Stifle Stork said. “Go away with them. Don't come back until they are satisfied, if then.”
    “But it's in another reality.”
    “They will doubtless get there,” Stifle said. “Stay with them until they are satisfied.”
    “I'm not sure about this,” Surprise said. “How can we go there if the fissure closed?”
    “The storks have access to all realities,” Che said. “I believe it is a particular spell they do not share with others. They even have access to parts of Mundania, to deliver to conservative families.”
    “Then why hasn't the Simurgh gone to the Stork Works in that reality to return herself?”
    “That remains a mystery I mean to solve.” Che looked around. “But first we need to obtain the Mask.”
    “Mask?”
    “The Reality Mask. It sifts and sorts realities according to parameters we can select, so that we can reduce the number of Xanths to check. With Stymy Stork along, we should be able to zero in on the right one fairly efficiently, then go to where he delivered your baby.” He paused. “However, it may not be easy to obtain the Mask.”
    “Nothing is ever easy,” Surprise muttered. “Let's get on it. Where is the Mask?”
    “A fiery nymph has charge of it, on Lion Mountain. It is a fair flight there from here.”
    “Then by all means get started.” She looked at Stymy. “Follow us, wherever we may go.”
    Stymy nodded glumly.
    The children mounted the centaurs, who spread their wings and took off. The peeve and Stymy followed.
    As they achieved cruising altitude, Surprise tried to befriend the stork flying beside her, knowing that they would be dependent on him to locate her baby. “I realize that you were just doing your job as you saw it,” she said carefully. “I can see that the Stork Authority is very strict. Do you care to tell us how you got put on probation?”
    “It's no secret,” Stymy said glumly. “I am cursed by bad luck, whether I'm working the Gold Coast, the Silver Coast, the Copper Coast, or the extinct Ivory Coast. I do the best I can, but things go wrong.”
    “I know the feeling,” Surprise said sympathetically. She really did feel it, now that she was coming to know the stork. He had evidently been around, but was obviously very low in the stork hierarchy.
    “First I flew through an invisible forget whorl that wasn't on the chart. I suffered only a glancing blow, but it was enough to lose the baby's name. I delivered the