Straight Talking by Jane Green Read Free Book Online

me too. Bye.”
    I put the phone down, puzzled, but hey, he was busy. I suppose
you
would have known instantly that something was up, wouldn’t you, but when something extraordinary happens, something out of the ordinary, you don’t question it because you don’t want to believe that anything could rock your safe, secure world. But you always know. It’s a woman’s sixth instinct, she can smell infidelity from miles away, but it’s only ever afterward that she’ll tell you. When she’s phoning you saying he’s out all the time you know she knows but she’ll never admit it. Put the thought in her mind and she’ll dismiss it in fury.
    But afterward, when the tears have been shed and the accusations defended, afterward she’ll tell you that she knew. The minute the thought of infidelity crossed his mind, she knew.
    At 10:30 the phone rang again. I leaped on it, knowing it was Simon saying, “I’m just leaving,” but it wasn’t. It was another friend of Simon’s, wanting to know if he was coming to the football. It could have waited until morning but I wanted to hear Simon’s voice so I offered to call Simon and then ring him back.
    The phone rang and rang and rang. He’s probably gone to the loo, I thought, or popped out to grab a beer. But even as I thought it a little nugget of sickness inched its way into my stomach. I rang again at eleven, and twelve and one and two. Like I need to tell you the rest of the story. Yes, I started panicking, and by three I was convinced he’d been run over. Maybe he’s at Adam’s, yes that’s it, he didn’t want to wake me so he’s gone to stay at Adam’s.
    Talk about irrational, but you only know what they want you to know. So what did I, the madwoman, do? I put Simon’s duffle coat over my men’s striped pajamas and climbed into his lovely blue Citroën that I wasn’t supposed to drive, and drove to Adam’s in Maida Vale.
    I sat outside Adam’s flat for ages, because I couldn’t see any lights, and I tried to calm myself down. He’s definitely in there, I told myself, they’re probably sitting up talking and getting stoned.
    Eventually I was calm, for a madwoman anyway, and I walked up the steps to the front door. This was crazy, it was 3:30 in the morning and I was looking for my boyfriend, disturbing his best friend in the middle of the night. I didn’t want to take those steps, part of me didn’t want to know whether he was there or not. Maybe if I turned round now and drove home, maybe it would all be all right, maybe he would be lying in bed waiting for me, half asleep, exhausted from his work. But I had to go on, didn’t I? Had to ring on the doorbell and ring and ring and ring, until finally Adam, poor bastard, opened the door.
    The minute the door opened I knew I’d made a mistake, a really big one, and I wished to God I’d never come. “Oh Christ, I’m so sorry, Ad. I don’t know where Simon is. He told me he was working late but he’s not in the office and I don’t know what’s happened to him. I’m so worried, maybe he’s been in an accident.” I actually said that! Can you believe it, like something out of a sitcom, isn’t it? “I thought maybe he’d be here with you. Shit. I’m sorry. I’ll go. Go back to bed, I’m really sorry.”
    “For God’s sake, Tash,” Adam said, rubbing his eyes with one hand and reaching out to pull me inside with his other. “What the hell are you going on about?”
    Adam made me a cup of tea, bless him. He had to look in every cupboard to find the teabags, and when he made the tea he smelled the milk before pouring it. Good job because it was about a year out of date. Stunk the place out. But he put sugar in and it was hot and sweet and soothing.
    I couldn’t keep still. Sitting there trying to sip the scalding tea while tapping one leg furiously against the floor, Adam phoned my home, our home, saying, “He’ll be home by now, I’m sure of it.”
    But naturally the bastard wasn’t, and Adam