Stripping Asjiah II by Sa'Rese Thompson. Read Free Book Online

by curtains, giving privacy to the recovering girls that had gone before me.
“Right this way.”
    I felt like I was floating as I followed the nurse towards a medicine cart.
“Here, take these then wait in the room down the hall. You‟ll begin to have severe cramping but they‟re just contractions. Someone will come in to check on you and make sure you‟ve dilated enough and then you‟ll be escorted into the operating room.”
She left me alone in the hallway with this Dixie cup filled with pills; one red, one blue. Funny, I didn‟t feel like Alice in Wonderland. For a minute I zoned out and found myself waiting for a bunny in a waist coat to come and tell me that I was late and show me the way out of here but it never happened.
I knew that neither one of these pills would shrink me and allow me to walk out of here unnoticed nor would the other make me a giant and allowme to step on CJ‟s throat for putting me through this shit.
I knew the minute I swallowed them I would seal my child‟s fate. The little heart that I heard beating just a few minutes ago would stop. The little hands that I saw would now wave good bye.
I found a bathroom down the hall and splashed water on my face. I flicked some of the water off my fingertips onto the mirror and watched as the drops created streaks distorting my reflection.
“What the fuck am I doing?”
I placed my hands on each side of the basin, closed my eyes and tried to clear my head. This was my baby, a life that I helped create, someone who was depending on me for survival and here I was contemplating ending its life.
I began to think that all the doctors and the nurses that I had talked to today were all angels trying to guide me and push me to make the right choice. All of them except for the bitch who handed me this cup; she had to be the devil; waiting to claim my baby.
I felt a kick as tears rolled down my cheeks. Too many times I had allowed the actions of others to dictate my life, I was tired of doing as I was told, tired of going with the flow just to get by.
My life had been disrupted because of one man‟s decision and that one single act had triggered a snowball effect.
My mother would never be by my bedside as I delivered my first kid; she wouldn‟t be present at my wedding. There were so many aspects of my life that she wouldn‟t be a part of. My father would never walk me down the aisle, he wouldn‟t get to meet my boyfriend, and they would never get to do the “traditional” before you marry my daughter type thing.
So many things that others took for granted, I had to think about because the dynamics of having a relationship with me were completely different than that of an average girl.
If I chose not to have this abortion, things between me and CJ would never be the same. We wouldn‟t be able to come and go as we pleased without having to find a babysitter first, things would be placed on fast forward and all the pressures and stress we never dealt with before would be staring us right in the face.
There were a lot of things I had yet to experience in life, but was that enough to validate my reason for doing this? Could I be that selfish? Could I allow myself to be swallowed up in the avalanche?
“Fuck this.”
I walked over to one of the stalls and tossed the pills into the toilet. Pushing the lever, I smiled as swirls of red and blue mixed in with the water and then disappeared.
I found myself whistling Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious as I walked out of the bathroom and went back downstairs.

Chapter Seven
    “Hello?”
“ You have a collect call from: LT.”
“ Press one to hear the charges for this call, five to accept, or simply hang up to deny. ”
She had been avoiding him for the past three weeks in hopes that he would get the hint but it seemed like the more she ignored him, the more he called her.
    She carefully placed the pregnancy test on the counter, washed her hands, took a deep breath then pressed the corresponding