Tailspin (Better Than You) by Raquel Valldeperas Read Free Book Online

opportunity to scan the faces of the kids surrounding me, wondering who exactly brought what and where it all came from. Most of the stuff is prescription, except for the ecstasy I saw floating around earlier. Stuff that can be found in medicine cabinets in normal houses. Even in my house. I make a note to flush all of the pills when I get home and walk into the kitchen.
    By two in the morning, the party has fizzled out and everyone who is left is drinking the remaining beer around the bonfire outside. When I realize that Hannah isn’t next to me anymore, I start towards the kitchen, stopping in my tracks just outside the entrance. Russell and Melanie are bent over the counter, straws pressed against their noses and Thomas standing behind counting off. Without thinking twice, I pull my cell out of my pocket and take a few pictures as Russell and Melanie inhale the thin, white powder. When they’re done, I pocket my cell and walk in, trying desperately to steady my breathing and my shaking hands.
    “Ready to go?” I ask Hannah, who jumps down from the counter and saunters over to me with red-rimmed eyes. She looks like a completely different girl than the one I walked in with, someone I would never want to get to know, someone very lost and alone.
    We say our goodbyes and I drive her home, completely lost in my thoughts the entire time; thoughts that have my head spinning with uncertainties and doubts, questions and concerns. Suddenly the simplicity of the bar and the idea of finding a smaller, less expensive house doesn’t seem so bad.
     

7
     
    December 7, 2007
     
    I convinced the Chief to wait until after Thanksgiving to raid one of Russell’s parties; told him that the biggest party of the year will be held on the last day of school before winter break. What I didn’t tell him was that I was stalling, trying to find a way to make all of this less painful for Russell and Hannah, the two who will take the biggest fall. Because, yeah, they’re dealing prescription drugs and playing with cocaine, but they’ve been left to fend for themselves by parents who couldn’t give a shit and a cruel world that wouldn’t give them a break. I guess in a way I can relate to them and their tendencies to compensate, filling the loneliness in their lives with designer clothes and fake friends. Who knows what would have happened to me if I didn’t have Emily and Joshua.
    As usual, I’m waiting in the driveway for Hannah to come out, staring at the giant house in front of me that gives no signs of housing living, breathing people. The door opens and closes quickly, and then Hannah walks to the passenger side, letting out a deep breath once seated next to me.
    “God, I hate that house,” she says.
    “Where are your parents this time?”
    “I don’t even know. Swiss Alps maybe?” She laughs and shakes her head. “Just kidding. I made that up.”
    Swallowing down the guilt and nervousness threatening to rip me apart, I ask, “What did you bring this time?”
    I glance at Hannah and see her smile wide before putting my eyes back on the road. “Mom just got all of her prescriptions filled.” She digs in her giant purse and pulls out one bottle at a time. “Roxicodone, Alprazolam, Lorazepam…” she trails off and starts digging in her bag again. “And…hold on…here it is.”
    From the corner of my eye, I see a ziploc bag half filled with white powder. My heart starts to beat faster. “That’s a lot,” I say casually, hoping she can’t hear the strain in my voice.
    “Found it under Mom’s bed. She’s such a dumb bitch sometimes.”
    “Do you think it’s a good idea to bring it into the party?”
    She scoffs loudly. “Are you kidding? It’s a great idea. They’ll love it.”
    I swallow down the urge to tell her everything. After a few minutes of driving in silence, she gasps dramatically. “Maybe Mr. Wilson will be there again.”
    “Mr. Wilson?” I repeat.
    “Yeah, he’s one of the English teachers.