Tales from the Captain’s Table by Keith R.A. DeCandido Read Free Book Online Page A

bear.
    Then a satisfied grin split his bewhiskered face. “Very well. I will not harm the woman, heh. In three days, we will reach our stronghold on Terriveyt Island. You will perform there for a large crowd, heh.” It was clear to me that he meant a large paying crowd. “I will even supply all the instruments and costumes you will need to mount your show.”
    Three days, I thought. That would almost surely give Commander Keru ample time to get Deanna and me out of here. Though exactly how he would do it under the watchful eye of the Pelagian authorities, and without transporters, I had no clear idea.
    “All right,” I said.
    Still grinning, Torr’ghaff turned to leave. But I wasn’t finished with him.
    “But I have one additional condition, eh?”
    He sighed, then faced me again. “Oh, yes. You want all the sweets served backstage to be of a particular color, neh?”
    I shook my head. “I think it might be best not to be fussy about that, under the circumstances.”
    “Wise,” he said, nodding.
    “But I want the woman to be on the stage with me. Unharmed, neh.”
    He nodded, a light of understanding flickering in his eyes. His grin became a leer. “Ah. You wish to serenade her before the audience. And later…”
    I wanted to grab his tongue and pull it out by the roots. Instead, I did my best to copy his leer. “Exactly.”
    “Agreed! Please my men with your music, Urr’hilf, and I guarantee you a night of pleasure afterward, heh. And should your people refuse to pay the ransom, I promise to spare you all possible pain when I have you diced and thrown overboard—along with the false pirate queen.”
    He exited, and the door slammed shut with the finality of a tomb.
    Now all I had to do was fake my way through a long live set of music I had mostly never heard before, authored by a musician I knew nothing about, using an instrument I really didn’t even know how to play. No problem.
    Thank whatever gods watch over drunks, little children, and former first officers from ships named Enterprise for the Pelagian tympanic squids.
    Thanks to the popularity of Fegrr’ep Urr’hilf among Torr’ghaff’s crew—and the lousy soundproofing aboard his ship—I got to hear a great deal of Urr’hilf’s organically recorded repertoire. By the time the ship made landfall three days later, I was beginning to think I might actually have half a chance of pulling this off.
    “You okay?” I whispered to Deanna as five cutlass-and-pistol-wielding Pelagian pirates walked us side by side down a gangplank and onto the dilapidated docks that lined an island marina. Once again, the orange sun stood high in the sky. That sun had set three times and risen twice since I had last seen her.
    “I’ve been through worse,” she looked drawn and pale, the once neat, close-cropped rows of her new Pelagian hairstyle now looking disheveled. But she no longer seemed loopy. The indigenous alcohol must have finally worn off.
    “Torture?” I asked quietly, fearing the worst.
    “I suppose that’s debatable. Torr’ghaff has been withholding chocolate. On Betazed, that’s considered a basic violation of humanoid rights and the laws of warfare.”
    I was glad her sense of humor hadn’t suffered.
    We were separated a few minutes later, as we reached a large amphitheater that had been built right alongside the docks. I presumed that Deanna had been taken to some sort of green room, to await the start of the concert.
    Hordes of Pelagians—all of them outlaws and pirates, judging from their mode of dress—were already lining up and entering the bowl-shaped, open-air concert hall, and I could hear the voices of what sounded like thousands more already inside. Had our captors somehow used their tympanic squids to get advance word of this concert to the island? Regardless, Torr’ghaff obviously stood to make a fortune, assuming my performance was well received. I didn’t want to think about what might happen if it wasn’t.
    I was escorted