Tales of the Fallen Book I: Awakenings by Edward Lee, David G. Barnett Read Free Book Online Page A

right?”
    “Uh-uh,” Travis said, continuing his new adventures in eloquence.
    The beast put both arms out, palms facing Travis. “Wait, wait!” he said, motioning with his hands in a, once-again, girlie way. “You think this is good? You need to see the backside.” And with that the beast jumped up, spun around in the air, landing with a resounding thud and cocked his ass out for Travis to see, which wasn’t hard since the creature, being eight feet tall…well…his ass was kind of right in Travis’ line of sight.
    “Take a look at that, my man. Tell me that isn’t the sweetest ass you’ve ever seen on this plane or any other.”
    Travis took a small step back, thought about it, and took a big step even further back, gave a quick nod and agreed. “Um, yeah. It’s a very…nice ass.”
    The beast wiggled his glorious ass at Travis. “Damn straight, Chico. This thing is a bitch magnet.” Then he wagged it one more time, slapped it hard on the right cheek, jumped up, spun around again, and landed facing Travis, his huge, red, cat eyes focusing on the trembling little shit before him.
    “Alright, Chico. What the hell do you want?”
    The question snapped Travis out of his stupor and he immediately launched into his well-practiced speech: “For years I have sought the means to summon you, oh Lord. I have scoured the globe searching for the spell that would bring you to me and deliver me that which my heart so desires.” Travis emphasized parts of his speech with hand gestures that the beast deemed forced and staged. “From the great plains of Africa, to caves buried deep in the South American jungles and in the highest mountains of Asia, I have…”
    “Wait a sec…”
    “…killed and destroyed countless in the search for…”
    “Hold on now…”
    “…the one thing that would…”
    “SHUT THE FUCK UP!”
    One thing a person should always know when dealing with an eight-foot-tall demon, when they tell you to “SHUT THE FUCK UP!” you…shut the fuck up. So that’s what Travis did.
    “Look at me, Chico.” The beast leaned down so he was eye to eye with Travis. “Do I fucking look like I care what you did to summon me? Huh, do I?”
    Travis was as surprised by the question as he was by the fresh, minty breath of the beast. He kind of expected: dead, rotten meat, sulfur, a huge unwashed ass. Still, Travis was told he would have to show his dedication to the demon. Show the trials and difficulties he went through to acquire the spell and the implements needed to summon the beast. “Well, I was told I had to…”
    “Yeah, yeah.” The beast stood back up to full height, rolling his eyes. “I know, you were told I need to know just how much you went through to call me, blah, fucking blah.”
    “But…” Travis feebly tried to interject.
    “See, Chico, you ain’t the first to call me and it’s always the same old story and I don’t really fucking care anymore. Besides, all you had to do was go to a machine at a small grocery store on 5th and 26th and the spell is in one of those temporary tattoo dispensers, you dumbass.” The beast shook his head in disgust at Travis. “So tell me what you want and we can get this shit over with.”
    Travis was a little dumbfounded. He knew what he wanted, but that came at the end of his speech. And now he scrambled to run through his entire diatribe in his mind. What did I want? he thought. Fuck! “Well…”
    But before he could get anything else out, the giant claw quickly dropped and clamped to his head. Travis soon found himself about two feet off the ground looking directly into the demon’s face, and once again, smelling his lovely, minty breath.
    “And let me say this up front, Chico. It had better be fucking good or I’m gonna swallow you whole and let you pass through my digestive system alive. And believe me, there are nasty-ass things down there.” Travis’ eyes were wide with fear and he felt a nice warmth spread down his left leg.