The Angel Stone: A Novel by Juliet Dark Read Free Book Online Page B

in my backpack and drew out a round pomander ball and Ralph, who was, amazingly, still asleep.
    “Aw.” Red Riding Hood, who had barely reacted to Frank pummeling her attacker, revived herself to coo at Ralph. “A little mouse! He’s adorable!”
    “He’s got a job to do. Wake up, Ralph!” I poked his fat, Cheetos-filled belly. Ralph yawned and stretched, evoking another chorus of oohs and ahs from Red, and looked up at me expectantly. “Take this into the yard,” I said, holding the pomander ball up by its ribbon. It had originally been a Christmas gift from Diana. She had filled it with potpourri. I had filled it with something else. “Then drop it and run—and be careful. They’re taking potshots at ceramic animals.”
    Ralph took the ribbon in his mouth and jumped onto the fence. He ran along the top railing. When he vanished into the yard, I motioned for Frank and Red to follow me into the gazebo. We climbed to the top and observed Ralph’s progress. He was creeping along the fence.
    “I’d have thrown it, but I was afraid the contents might explode,” I explained to Frank when Red slumped on the gazebo bench and started snoring.
    “Good to know you’ve been carrying unstable explosives all night, McFay,” Frank said. “How are you going to activate it from here?”
    “I planted a correlative fuse inside. It’s magically connected to this one.” I held up half a shoelace—the only thing I could find to use. “I just have to light it when Ralph drops the ball.”
    I peered into the yard and saw Ralph drop the ball at the feet of Adam Sinclair. He was beginning to run back when Slutty Vampire shrieked, “A mouse! A mouse! A real mouse! Shoot it!”
    Adam wheeled around in a circle, one foot crunching the pomander, and spotted Ralph, clearly visible by the white patch on his chest. He lowered the gun and aimed it at Ralph.
    I lit the fuse. Just as Adam pulled the trigger, the pomander exploded in a cloud of smoke, throwing him off balance. He fell backward, right into Slutty Vampire and Slutty Nurse. The girls giggled and shrieked at the sudden closeness of a half-naked frat boy, but when the smoke from my pomander reached them, they both pushed him away.
    “Ew,” Slutty Vampire said, wrinkling her nose. “You’re kind of gross.”
    “Yeah,” Slutty Nurse agreed. “When was the last time you showered?”
    Both girls rearranged their costumes to cover a few extrainches of skin. The other girls at the party extricated themselves from the arms of the frat boys, with similar comments on personal hygiene.
    Frank wrinkled his nose. “What was that, McFay?”
    “An anti-aphrodisiac,” I said. “It makes any male within a hundred-yard radius repellent to any female. The Alphas won’t be luring any girls to their parties anytime soon.”
    Red Riding Hood murmured in her sleep, “Boys stink!”
    “I’ll get Red back to my house,” I said. “You’d better go home and take a shower.” Frank shot me an accusing look. “I just mean that you’ll want to get rid of any traces of the spell. I’m not sure how long it lasts.”
    “Thanks, McFay. Like I wasn’t having a hard enough time in my love life.”
    We half-carried Red Riding Hood out of the gazebo and across the street to my house. The Alphas were too busy fanning smoke out of their yard to notice us. I took the opportunity to grab a couple of Diana’s gnomes off the back fence. I knew she was fond of them and that she’d be devastated to see them serving as target practice—especially since I was pretty sure they were partly sentient.
    Frank helped me get Red into my house and then excused himself when she woke up enough to tell him that he reeked. I watched Frank walk down Elm Street toward his downtown apartment, then I got Little Red Riding Hood settled on my library couch, tucking my afghan over her. Asleep, she looked as young and innocent as the girl in the fairy tale. As I turned off the lights in the library, I reflected