The Boy Recession by Flynn Meaney Read Free Book Online

pulls up, revealing his flat, almost hairless stomach. “I never think anything really changes like that. But now, I mean, I dunno. Look at them!”
    Bobbi and Eugene are toasting marshmallows, and their shoulders are touching as they hold their sticks close to the fire. Everyone is watching them now. Behind me, a spandexer stops texting to stare at Bobbi and Eugene.
    “Oh my God,” she says, in a hushed whisper. “She
gave him her marshmallow
.”
    Her friend turns to her and asks, “Is it me, or does Eugene look a little cuter this year?”
    I tell Hunter I’ll see him later. I’ve gotta get back to Darcy and Aviva and let them know that the situation is bigger than just Eugene and Bobbi.
The Boy Recession.
I think I’ve got a name for Aviva’s column, too.

CHAPTER 6: HUNTER
    “Quarterback, Not Sexy Back: Julius Football Team Lacks Athletic Skills, Hotness”
    “The Boy Recession©” by Aviva Roth,
The Julius Journal
, September
    W ow. There are a lot of active people out here.
    I’m on my longboard, heading out to the football field behind Julius, and I see all these people running, sweating, and hitting one another with sticks. The cross-country runners are coming at me in this huge pack, huffing and puffing like crazy, and on the tennis court, Bobbi Novak is practicing her killer serve.
    I’m not usually out on the sports fields after school, but a few minutes ago, Derek texted me
You gotta see this
, and told me to come out to the football field. I’m betting fifty bucks he’s trying to skateboard off the bleachers again. Last time he broke his arm in two places.
    Derek is on the bleachers, but he’s not jumping off them. He’s just lounging, hanging out with Dave and Damian. The three of them are in this nonexistent bandcalled the D-Bags. Freshman year, the three of them decided it would be cool to start a band, but they never actually bothered to learn to play any instruments.
    “What’s up?” I say, climbing onto the bleachers.
    “We’re watching football tryouts,” Derek tells me, squinting up at me from under the brim of his hat.
    “This sucks,” Dave adds. “They need to put pads on. No one is hitting each other.”
    Dave’s always muttering under his breath, but we’re used to it and just ignore him.
    “Tryouts?” I say. “What the hell? Doesn’t the season start, like, next week?”
    “Four of our starters transferred,” Damian tells me.
    Damian’s a good guy, and he knows a surprising shitload about football, even though he spends most of his time in his basement, playing
World of Warcraft
.
    “So they’ve gotta move up the guys from the bench,” Damian says.
    “And they’ve gotta recruit new schmucks to sit on the bench,” Dave says.
    “One of which is…” Derek says as he points his arm toward the field.
    I turn around and shield my eyes from the sun. The guys on the field are getting into position, wearing those dumb nylon jerseys we have to wear in gym class, and our dumb gym teacher, who always blows his whistle too loud and is our new football coach, is out there. That’s when I see him.
    “What?” I balk, turning back to Derek. “What the hell? Eugene is out there?”
    Derek’s leaning back against the bleachers with both of his arms outstretched, and he’s got the biggest grin on his face.
    “Eugene’s out there.”
    “He’s trying out for the football team? Is this a joke? Is he trying to bust everyone’s balls?”
    “He’s trying out for the football team,” Derek says, nodding.
    “They really need guys,” Damian says. “They’re desperate. The coach even tried to recruit Dave.”
    “As if,” mutters Dave. “Fuckers.”
    “Obviously, Dave told them to fuck off.” Derek laughs. “But Eugene embraced it as part of his master plan.”
    “He thinks he’s gonna get into Bobbi’s pants,” Dave says. “But he’s not.”
    “So, what, Eugene thinks that girls only give it up to big, manly football players?” I say.
    “No, you