The Child Whisperer by Carol Tuttle Read Free Book Online Page B

state of happiness.
    If you parent a Type 1 child, notice the little things they do every day with the intent to put a smile on your face. Remember, they are more random and don’t always think things through. I am certain your Type 1 child has gotten into trouble sometimes for doing something that was designed in their mind to cheer you up. When this happens, they are really not sure why they are in trouble, when their intent was to bring you joy.
    Type 1 children dislike situations in which others get upset about relatively small issues. These children will experience serious punishment or a mistake blown out of proportion as a bigger emotional downer than their parents may realize. In the words of my Type 1 son, Mario, “It makes me feel like life is wrong when people bring their worries to where we are having fun.” If your Type 1 child is not expressing their naturally light energy effortlessly, consider which situations around them might weigh their feelings down.

    Child Whisperer Tip: Having happy parents is a big priority for Type 1 children. If they perceive that their parents are unhappy with them, these children will often adapt to try and cheer their parents up. This is not a child’s responsibility, but a Type 1 will try to take it on, especially if they feel unhappiness is directed at them personally. If you are upset or sad, reassure your Type 1 child that everyone is sad sometimes, that you will be happy again, and that they are okay. Never use disappointment or an expression of unhappiness to coerce or manipulate your Type 1 child into behavior that you want.
    When my Type 1 daughter, Jenny, was only 8 years old, I noticed she would pull out the vacuum and start vacuuming the house when I was upset. I figured out that her reason for doing this was to try and make me happy. I made sure I let her know that my happiness was not her job and that I appreciated her doing something to make me happy. My job as her parent was to turn my mood around so she would not feel stressed about her unhappy mother.
    How can you help your Type 1 receive the gift of having a happy parent? List some things you want to focus on here:

    If you don’t feel emotionally connected to your Type 1 child, there’s a reason. Consider the possibility that your child has one of these experiences with you:

They are not having fun with you.
    They feel everything is heavy and serious when they are with you.
They feel controlled, like they have no room to breathe and express their random nature.
They feel judged or unimportant because of their light, airy nature.
They are confused about who they are because their true expression is in conflict with what has been judged by their parent as a weakness.

    Having things light and playful is not a preference or a wish for a Type 1 child. They need fun. They need spontaneity. Imagine telling the wind to just calm down and be more responsible. When you honor your Type 1 child’s true nature, you will see them become happier and more emotionally responsive to you.

    Child Whisperer Tip: Keeping things light and fun doesn’t mean you have to come up with activities and games constantly. Light and fun is a mood, an energy. Notice the tone of your voice and the mood of your home. Do you speak in a friendly, loving voice? Do you let you Type 1 child run and bounce at home? Allow them to create their own fun and express their naturally light energy.

    . . . .

    MARIO’S STORY
    Type 1s Respond to Support!
    I met our Type 1 son, Mario, when he was an 11-year-old boy. He came into our family when he was 15 and we officially adopted him when he was 17. Mario came from an abusive background, and his Type 1 nature had been judged most of his life as irresponsible. This led him to believe he was incompetent—which was another, more subtle layer of abuse that needed to be healed in his life. He had many limiting beliefs that he could not succeed in school and that his animated nature was immature.
    He had