The Color of Joy by Julianne MacLean Read Free Book Online

present yourself. I think you’d be amazing at that. Do you want me to Google it?”
    I pulled out my phone and searched for some programs she could enroll in. Most of them were six months to a year in duration. Some of them were offered by correspondence.
    She picked up her wine again. “I don’t know about this.”
    “Why not?” Please, Sylvie . Give it a chance.
    “I don’t want to do anything by correspondence. Like you said, I’m in a rut. I’d be kidding myself if I thought I could wake up in the morning and break out the books. You know I work late. I need to sleep in the day.”
    Though she was hesitant, the fact that we were even discussing this was astounding to me. I knew I couldn’t drop the ball now. Not while she was actually considering a real change.
    Maybe it was a mistake not to think it through, but suddenly I found myself blurting out another option. “What if you moved in with me ?”
    Sylvie inclined her head doubtfully. “Seriously? I don’t think Jake would be too happy about that.”
    “Well…maybe not under normal circumstances, but things aren’t exactly normal right now.”
    “What do you mean?”
    Should I be doing this?
    A part of me worried about telling Sylvie the truth. It wasn’t exactly the best timing after her break up with John. Nevertheless, I carried on.
    “No one knows this yet,” I said. “I haven’t even told Mom, but Jake just found out he’s getting deployed to Afghanistan. He’ll be gone for nine months, and on top of that…” I paused. “Well…I’m pregnant.”
    My sister stared at me, expressionless. “Pregnant?”
    I forced myself to smile brightly and nod, hoping my joy would somehow reflect back at me. “Yes!”
    My news was met with silence. Then Sylvie finally spoke. “That’s amazing. Really. But I thought Jake didn’t want kids.”
    I tried to keep the mood light. “It wasn’t exactly planned.”
    She blinked a few times, then at last, she leaned forward to hug me. “Congratulations. I’m happy for you.”
    “Thank you.” I knew my sister too well, however, and felt an emotional thundercloud roll into the room. Here we go .
    Sylvie rose from the sofa and looked down at me. “Well, this definitely calls for a toast.”
    With a sigh of defeat, I watched her stride into the kitchen, pull another bottle of wine out of the rack on the counter and hunt around for a corkscrew.
    “Here it is,” she said to herself as she opened a drawer. With trembling hands, she pulled the cork out with a pop . Still seated on the sofa, I was surprised when she poured me a glass.
    “I can’t drink that,” I reminded her.
    She stopped, set the bottle down and let out a silly laugh. “Oh, what an idiot. Of course you can’t. That sucks. Cheers anyway.”
    Raising her own glass, she took a deep swig, then glanced around the kitchen as if she were searching for something, but didn’t know what it was.
    I rose from the sofa and joined her. “Jake’s going to be gone for a long time. I could really use your company, Sylvie. It would be good for both of us because I don’t want to do this alone. You could get out of your lease, quit your job and live with me rent free until you get back on your feet. Think about it. You could go to school and take whatever kind of course you want. It would be a fresh start, and you wouldn’t be alone either.”
    Her gaze dipped to my belly, which was still as flat as a pancake. “I don’t know, Jenn. I’m not sure I could handle being around you.”
    I swallowed uneasily. “Why not?”
    She scoffed. “You know why.” She gestured toward my belly.
    Of course, I understood that she was referring to the abortion she’d had when she was sixteen. The two of us had always spent our summer holidays with our grandparents on the coast of Maine, and during one exceptionally hot summer, Sylvie fell fast and hard for a handsome eighteen-year-old. She didn’t find out she was pregnant until October, after we’d returned