The Lullaby of Polish Girls by Dagmara Dominczyk Read Free Book Online Page A

beside him and leans in.
    “Depeche Mode? Is this the tape you gave me last year?” Justyna asks. Sebastian takes off his headphones and continues staring out in front of him.
    “So?”
    “So there’s new stuff out now. It’s called keeping up with the times,Tefilski. You should try it.” Justyna smiles lazily but Sebastian is impatient, thrusting his hand out.
    “
Jezus Maria
, what’s your problem? You should be glad I’m here. I could be at home sleeping right now, you know. Instead I’m playing postman.”
    “Just give it to me.”
    Justyna huffs and digs into her skirt pocket. She produces a piece of white paper, folded into a small, neat square. Sebastian grabs it, the excited smile on his face almost embarrassing. Did she ever make him that happy, Justyna wonders. But just like that Sebastian’s smile fades. He stands up slowly and starts tearing the note into fragments, which drop to the ground like confetti. Justyna stands up next to him.
    “Not good?”
    Sebastian’s silence fills the air, and for a moment Justyna actually feels bad. But, no—Anna had it coming, they both did. When Justyna told Anna about her and Tefilski, to both brag and warn, it was as if Anna didn’t hear the subtext, as if Justyna’s leftovers were fine by her. The
Amerykanka
just did not give a shit about other people’s history, that much was clear. She was pathetically transparent, almost inhaling Sebastian when the two of them hugged goodbye. Justyna caught their whispered somethings, the looks they shared. Justyna wasn’t dumb.
    Sebastian Tefilski and Justyna Zator went back, way back to First Holy Communion. They were eight and assigned to walk down the church aisle side by side, one of thirteen pairs. They made their way down toward the altar just like in practice, doing a slow, methodical two-step, trying not to laugh. At one point, when she had just about had it with her itchy stockings, Justyna furtively scratched her crack and Sebastian caught her and smiled and she stuck her tongue out at him, before sticking her tongue out for the sanctified wafer. And from that day forward, Sebastian and Justyna were forever in and out of love.
    Anka Baran was not just usurping an old boyfriend; she was after the first boy that ever truly loved Justyna, so what did a few forged sentences matter? Still, she wouldn’t mind becoming friends with the foreigner, if only to satisfy her curiosity. So she’s already planning futureshopping trips with Anna to the Puchatek mall, and sleepovers. They
will
be friends—because aside from the occasional romp with nutty Kamila Marchewska, Justyna doesn’t really hang out with girls. Anna Baran would fill the gap nicely.
    Sebastian recites from memory, his voice robotic, dazed. “ ‘Dear Sebastian, I have a boyfriend in America. It’s pretty serious. I guess I felt bad for you and didn’t know how to tell you but please, don’t bother waiting for me. Have a good summer. Your friend, Anna Baran.’ ”
    Justyna smirks. “ ‘I felt bad for you’? Ewww. Who does she think she is? Right?” She tugs on his arm. “Right?”
    Sebastian looks into Justyna’s face, and the shame he’s feeling is too deep to hide.
    “You know what, Tefilski? Fuck her. And don’t even think about writing to her, unless you want to come off like a sniveling beggar.” She moves closer. “You’re better than her anyway. She wouldn’t know what to do with you even if she wanted you.” Their noses are almost touching now and Sebastian doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t move away.
    “Remember last summer when we broke up? Remember why?” Justyna’s fingers find his zipper, and then quickly find their way inside his jeans. His penis feels like dough, pliant and soft. But as she starts kneading with both hands, it doesn’t stay soft for long. “We broke up because I wasn’t ready, right?”
    Sebastian exhales.
    “Well, guess what, Tefilski? I’m ready now.”
    And with that, Justyna gingerly