The Secret of Life Wellness: The Essential Guide to Life's Big Questions by Inna Segal Read Free Book Online

old she said, “Mummy, I love you
    more than the world, more than the universe, more than all the galaxies, but I’m
    really, really sorry.” At this point, she made a very sad face. I asked her what she was
    sorry about, and she said, “I love myself more.” She then paused and looked at me, “Just
    one dot more, because it’s important to love ourselves the most so that we can love
    other people.” I was really touched and impressed by her simple wisdom.
    For most people, loving themselves is an extensive journey of self-discovery, self-
    acceptance, and deep soul-searching. Although in spiritual circles the words love
    yourself are commonplace, not many seem to know what this means in practical terms.
    It is important not to reject the words but to delve deeper into their true meaning.
    Overcome Obstacles to Love
    Some of the biggest obstacles to self-love that I have observed are self-criticism and the
    need for perfectionism, which leads to harsh judgment of the self and, eventually,
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    Inna Segal
    illness. Our society teaches us to neglect ourselves and our own needs and desires. If we
    spend time nourishing ourselves and being soft with our imperfections we are often
    told that we are weak and selfish.
    I have noticed that for many people, taking any time out for themselves is more a
    luxury than a daily way of life. Yet, to love yourself you must have time to connect with
    who you are and get to know what works for you.
    Take a Journey of Self-Discovery
    Instead of comparing yourself to others, discover and embrace your own strengths and
    weaknesses. Knowing what you love, how you want to be treated, what makes you feel
    safe, what food you need to eat to be healthy, what exercise you need to feel strong,
    what work inspires you, the space and environment you need for yourself to learn and
    grow, are vital factors for being kind to yourself.
    When you know your internal limitations, you can be more forgiving with yourself
    and find others who can balance your weaknesses with their strengths. They can also
    guide you to gently and consistently work on some of your internal restrictions so that
    you can grow, learn, and move forward with more freedom.
    Practice the Way of Softness
    From early childhood, many of us are taught to be strong, tough, judgmental, competi-
    tive, and harsh. Thus, it is little wonder that we live in a world where aggression rules.
    However, as we are cocreators of our own lives, we can choose to create a different real-
    ity. Our opportunity is to embrace the way of softness and kindness.
    I would like you to stop reading this and take a moment to explore what it would
    mean to be soft with yourself this moment? When you contemplate softness, does your
    physiology change? Does your breath slow down? Do you feel lighter?
    What does it mean to be soft and gentle with others? How would you treat others
    if you felt soft and peaceful in yourself ? Softness and kindness can be a way of life and
    practiced daily.
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    The Secret of Life Wellness
    Make Time to Connect
    Loving yourself means taking care of yourself. This may involve having a time of day
    where you meditate, connect to your own body, go for a walk in nature, do a self-
    healing process, read, write, play sport, meet up with friends, focus on opening and
    nourishing your heart.
    Ask yourself: What kind of daily experiences would help me to feel nurtured?
    What would make my heart sing and my spirit soar?
    Self-love can be as simple as watching a butterfly, smelling a beautiful flower,
    drinking your favorite drink, listening to music, playing with a child, looking in the
    mirror and telling yourself that you are valuable and appreciated, dancing, singing, play-
    ing sports, looking at art that inspires you or receiving a hug from someone you love.
    Most important is to be in the present and deeply appreciate the