The Song of the Nightingale by Alys Clare Read Free Book Online

through his head, and he tried to dismiss them all.
    She must have appreciated what he was feeling, for instantly she began to speak. ‘Josse dear, I cannot reconcile my conscience if I remain here doing so little, when out in the wider world there are so many in such dire need. I have to do something to help. I cannot go back to the abbey, for reasons you and I have discussed before, but I intend to ask Abbess Caliste’s leave to return to the cell by St Edmund’s Chapel, where I lived before I came here, and from there offer aid and support as I once did.’
    He felt his heart race. He tried to speak, but his mouth was dry. He swallowed and tried again. ‘For ever?’ he whispered.
    He did not think she understood, at first. Then she did, and her face went pink. She had been looking into his eyes, but now hers dropped. She stared down at her hands, the fingers twisting together, and said, very softly, ‘I don’t know.’
    He didn’t stop to think. The idea of her leaving, going back to the tiny dwelling beside the chapel and living there all alone, without him, was intolerable.
    â€˜You would not be safe there on your own,’ he said harshly, pushing back the bench and pacing to and fro across the hall. ‘I cannot let you do it, Helewise.’
    â€˜Dear Josse, I am not asking your permission,’ she said gently. ‘Since you are bound for the abbey this morning, I’m asking if you will escort me there and, once inside, ask Abbess Caliste if she will come out to speak to me. It is
her
permission I need,’ she added softly.
    He stopped his pacing, pausing to stand right in front of her. Was this it, then? he wondered. Was this the end of his dream to change his relationship with this beloved woman, so that at long last they might be to one another what he had always hoped they would one day be?
    He studied her calm, resolute face.
    It seemed it probably was.
    â€˜You’d better prepare your pack,’ he said roughly. ‘I’m leaving as soon as I’ve finished my breakfast.’
    But he found his appetite had vanished. Turning on his heel, he muttered that he was going to see about the horses, and hurried out of the hall without looking back.
    Had he done so, a swift look at Helewise’s face might have given him pause for thought.
    Josse had barely finished asking Will to prepare Helewise’s mare when Meggie came running into the stables. Without preamble she took hold of his hand and said, ‘Father, Helewise has told me she’s going back to the cell by the chapel, and I want to go too.’ He made as if to speak but she wouldn’t let him. ‘No, no, please hear me out! I know you’ll say it isn’t safe and we’ll all get attacked and robbed and raped, but Helewise is going to get Tiphaine to join us, and Abbess Caliste will probably send one of the younger lay brothers to look after us at night, and we’ll be as safe there as here, Father, I know we will!’
    He shook his head, quite bemused. Why would Meggie want to go and live in the tiny cell? She didn’t—
    Then he knew. St Edmund’s Chapel was the closest building to the hut in the forest where Joanna had lived; where, indeed, Meggie had lived all her life until she came to the House in the Woods.
    For perhaps the first time ever, he looked at his daughter with an emotion other than solely love. ‘I would prefer it if you were honest about your motives, Meggie,’ he said, his tone chilly. ‘It is your hut, rather than helping Helewise tend the needy at the chapel, that draws you, I think.’
    Anger stirred amid the bright lights in her brown eyes. ‘You malign me, Father,’ she said, equally coldly. ‘I admit I am desperate to return to the hut, and I’ve made no secret of the fact. I shall indeed try to visit it, but it is not the reason I want to go with Helewise.’ Before he could ask her to explain,