The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio
penis, you spot unusual bumps or lesions, there’s a discharge from your urethra, you experience pain during or after sex, or your penis bends sharply upon erection, you should consult a doctor.
    Penises come in a variety of shape and size combinations too vast to catalog, and there’s no predicting what a soft penis will look like when erect. Long and thin, short and squat, curved up, down, left, right—it’s all normal. The variations make a man average. And average size? Average depends on whose statistics you’re looking at. A 1993 University of Toronto study of 63 men measured unerect penises along rulers placed at the base, and stretched them to get a range of 2 ⅜ inches to 5 ¼ inches, with 3 ¾ inches being the average. But soft means little when talking about average erect size. Almost forty years ago, Masters and Johnson found that smaller unerect penises grew more than the larger softies—showing that soft penises are no barometer for size. The truth about penis size is that there’s a lot of erection variation out there. But don’t forget—your cock is as big as your brain, meaning that the real measure is the size of the pleasure you give (and receive).

    Illustration 4. How Do I Look?
    If you want to compare how you look to men in porn movies, guys in Playgirl, or gay male mags, you certainly can—but it won’t give you an idea about what’s really out there, and more important, what your partners are seeing. Are you worried about how you look? Do you think that your penis, testicles, anus, or pubic area are too hairy, or not enough? They don’t look like the ones in porn? The cocks you see in magazines are airbrushed (often heavily) and lit, angled, covered in makeup, shaved, and positioned just so . In porn movies, makeup and shaving is standard, and as with the magazines, it’s only the guys who are larger than average that make the grade. You won’t see any regular penises in porn, period. And seldom any soft ones, for that matter.
    The huge market for penis enlargement gadgets, injections, operations, and pills neatly serves to reinforce your insecurities and sexual shame. It’s a business like any other, though it’s a kissing cousin to the diet industry and the breast augmentation industry—sleazy, and offering impossibly quick fixes to get you to “fit in” to unrealistic, invented, and often impossible standards. Penis enlargement is a bad idea. Vacuum pumps work only temporarily and can cause lasting damage if used improperly; also, the erections they provide are big but soft. No pill will make your dick bigger. And remember that any surgery you have on your urogenital system will cut through nerves, fibers, and erectile tissue—things you need in order to enjoy sex. Plus, silicone implants often need to be replaced, can become infected, and look lumpy. Liposuctioned fat eventually melts back into your body. Why put yourself through any of it when you could be enjoying a blow job instead?

    Do Vegetarians Taste Better?
    For men who worry about odors and flavors their partners may encounter, rest assured that your genitals smell and taste exactly like you—your skin, actually. The obvious answer to any cleanliness dilemma is to shower daily, and for men who have a foreskin, to be sure to clean under the hood—any buildup will lend a funky odor. If you’re wanting to impress your partner by emitting less odor, you can shower shortly before your encounter. If your partner is anxious about your flavor, showering together before fellatio can allay fears—they may even want to participate in getting you “squeaky clean” or might enjoy beginning oral sex in the tub.
    If you plan to ejaculate in your partner’s mouth, you might wonder if you taste okay. An obvious answer to this question is to taste it yourself first—for some, no big deal, but for others, this is something they’d rather skip. Whatever you decide, there are a few things you can do to make sure your come tastes

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