The Up-Down by Barry Gifford Read Free Book Online

outside. Had he really momentarily experienced being in the Up-Down, Pace wondered, or had that been an illusion? Perhaps that’s what the Up-Down is, he reasoned, an illusion. But how did that explain his blanking out on the trip back from Philadelphia? He was certain he had gone there, that Siempre Desalmado was a real person with whom he’d spent time. After all, Bitsy had welcomed him home. Pace noticed that he was fully dressed, but was he in his right mind?

 
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    In the middle of his second night back home, Pace awoke when he heard a voice say, “God is a disappointment to everyone.” He looked around his bedroom in the cottage but he was alone. The voice had been in his head, a voice he did not recognize. Pace was certain of the words, which he contemplated as he lay in the dark. It was a moonless night, lit only faintly by the stars. Pace closed his eyes, wanting to fall back asleep, hoping to hear the voice again.

 
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    The following morning, while Pace was sitting at the kitchen table in his cottage having a cup of coffee, he opened a book he had taken with him to Philadelphia intending to read, The Death Ship by B. Traven. A piece of paper, stationery from the Hotel Espíritu , folded into the book, fluttered out onto the table. Pace picked it up, unfolded and read what was written on it:
    THE BOOK OF EXCUSES
    This is The Missing Book of the Old Testament unearthed in the Valley of the Nobles in Egypt by Abdoul Kerim a self-described Wolf of the Desert and believed now to have been written by the same Unknown Author who used Solomon as a shield for the Book of Ecclesiastes but in truth was composed by Solomon’s mistress a blackskinned woman known only as Shulamith a shepherdess kidnapped by Solomon and kept apart from all others but eunuchs in his palace in Jerusalem therefore it was she who said There is an evil which I have seen under the sun and it is common among men.
    Adios,
    Siempre

 
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    â€œIf it’s a boy,” Bitsy said, “I’d like to name him Sailor. And if it’s a girl, Lula. Only if it’s all right with you, of course.”
    Pace said nothing. He was sitting at his desk and was actually in the middle of writing a sentence when Bitsy entered the cottage without knocking and told him this. Her announcement, Pace realized, was not totally unexpected by him. At least she had not suggested that the child, whether it was male or female, be named Pace.
    Bitsy stood next to him, caressing her swollen belly with her right hand. The fingers of her left hand were entwined in her hair, which she had let grow long. Bitsy’s honey-colored hair was not only longer now but more lustrous. She had never looked better to Pace but for some reason he fought the feeling.
    â€œCome on, Pace, tell me what you think. Even though I didn’t know your parents, I feel like I almost do through you. What you’ve told me and the way you are. Also, I love their names.”
    Pace stared at Bitsy, looking her over up and down. Most women, he thought, became more beautiful when they were pregnant, even if they didn’t think so, and Bitsy was no exception. Her color was richer due to the twenty-five percent more blood in her body. She glowed. This was not the same woman with whom he had made love.
    Finally, Pace said, “Have you asked Del what he thinks?”
    Bitsy nodded. “I have. He’s happy leavin’ the namin’ to me.”
    â€œIt’s okay, I guess.”
    Bitsy pushed herself up against Pace and kissed him on the top of his head.
    â€œThank you, darlin’,” she said. “It’ll mean a lot to me, just like you do.”
    Pace placed his right hand over hers. She put it under her own, on her stomach.
    â€œThat’s little Lula or Sailor kickin’ in there, Pace. Ain’t it just thrillin’ knowin’ that?”
    â€œIt’s still a little hard to believe.”
    â€œNot for