Transcending Nirvana (Dark Evoke #3) by V. L. Brock Read Free Book Online

down the hall, which was surely going to kill me. My left hand grasped at my throat, rubbing the flesh raw as I clamped down on my lower lip and breathed a brutal sigh. I was such a fucking dick. Fuck.
    “You need to step into her shoes. I’m going to go and give you both some time. You know where I am.” In her hands, she twisted my head and planted a kiss on my cheek. “You’ll get there,” she smiled, rubbing the sticky shit she just planted on my cheek away with her thumb. “You both will. Remember, everything happens for a reason,” were her departing words of encouragement, already pulling the door closed behind her.
    The living room was abandoned as I made my way heavily back up the hallway. I tried my luck and knocked on the door lightly. I forced myself to stop and listen as carefully as I could, attempting to detect movement from the opposite side. “Kady…Kady, open the door, darlin’.”
    Nothing.
    “Kady, for Christ sake, please, let me…” let you what, Walker? I didn’t fucking know what I wanted her to let me do: comfort her, keep her safe, or apologize?
    Apologize? Fuck no––no way was I going to apologize. I had nothing to be sorry for; the only thing I was sorry for was not getting her to leave the fuck-up she spent years loving and being brainwashed by, sooner. With my head against the door, the back of my fist thumped against the wood. “Jesus Christ, Kady––” I was sure I was either going to thump the bastard thing off the fuckin’ hinges, or I was going to pull my fucking hair out with the rate my hand was now gripping through it.
    How can one person cause your heart to constrict in both love and irritation?
    “Okay, just…just listen to me. I…” a gargling sound was made through my teeth as I sucked in air through my lips. “I just wanted to help. I don’t care that you hate me at the moment, darlin’. Hate me as much as you like.”
    Silence…
    “If it makes you feel any better, Da was opposed to the idea in the first place. Said that ‘in doing what we were asking, we were insinuating that you couldn’t look after yourself’,” I deepened my voice and it came out hoarse, sounding just like Da.
    More silence…
    I gave up, letting gravity win. Turning around in only my towel, I slipped down the barrier, and with my back braced up against the crumbling surface of the wall to the left side of the door, crossed my legs at the ankles, and folded my arms across my chest.
    “You must think I’m an idiot––an A-class dick right now.” I closed my eyes, whispering, “I wouldn’t fuckin’ blame ya,”
    What the fuck are you doing, Walker? Well, this is just grand; opening my fuckin’ heart up in the bareness of the corridor, to a closed fucking door was by far one of the most humiliating things I’d ever done.
    “You know, the night I met you, I knew, I–I just knew that you were someone worth…” saving was the word which came straight to mind, but I couldn’t say it. The lone word refused to leave my lips simply because I knew it was a lie. Kady reminded me so much of Her. And in the marrow of my bones I knew that I couldn’t save her…I couldn’t even save the person she reminded me of… “Protecting, I guess. You’re so stubborn, darlin’. I’m not stupid; stubbornness shouldn’t get confused with strength. I’m not saying you’re not strong, you are, just…”
    In the privacy of the hallway, I faintly shook my head and started chewing on my lip again before taking a deep breath. I looked up at the door but it remained shut, and movement on the opposite side was lacking. “You want to know why I did it, darlin’?” I lightly tapped my knuckles against the wood, and was again answered with silence. “I suppose that question is the only question I’ve hit the Goddamn nail on the head with. I didn’t take your money and spend it, Kady. I didn’t steal from you regardless of what you’re thinking. I did it because it was the only way I