Yes, Master by Margaret McHeyzer Read Free Book Online

just staring out at the black of the night.
    There’re so many thoughts that are jumbled and desperate to break through the barriers of my mind.
    Mason, am I attracted to him because he’s a sensual and beautiful man? Or is it because of what he did to me and I crave that touch to feel normal?
    Mason’s always been around. Even when he was going through his own demons, I’ve constantly wondered, what if?
    Nothing’s eventuated between us, but it seems to be getting more difficult to keep resisting this pull that I can’t deny.
    And Stella, it was last Saturday when I saw her and I can’t get her out of my mind.
    The way she looked at me, her eyes so green and so piercing. They penetrated deep inside as they hauled my entire being toward her lively soul.
    Is that why I’m so desperate to be near her?
    It’s almost like I’m addicted to pleasing her, even though all that happened was no more than a slight touch.
    I close my eyes and see her standing in front of me, her blonde hair is in a perfect straight style, her breasts are teasing me with that sexy dip between them, illustrating her alabaster flawless skin.
    Mason stands next to her and kisses her, his tongue peeks out as he gently licks her bottom lip.
    He turns to me, extends his hand and curls his fingers up, calling me over.
    I walk slowly toward them and weave my hand through Mason’s hair. I pull his mouth to mine and nip on his bottom lip.
    God, I want him so much.
    “Now now, don’t forget me,” Stella says as she stands behind me. Her body flattens against my back and her hands go under my shirt. With just her fingertips she traces the contours of my abs, running them up and circling my nipples as her hot mouth sucks the sensitive skin on my neck.
    Mason pushes himself into my front, and I can feel his hard-on pressing into my own arousal.
    “Hmmm,” I moan as Mason’s teeth graze my tongue.
    “I’d love to watch my two sexy playthings kissing. Give me a show, make me want you. Make me need you both,” Stella says as I feel her slip away from me.
    My back instantly cools when she moves away and a cold shiver runs up the length of my spine.  
    It also snaps me out of the fantasy I was having of being between Stella and Mason. The fantasy that’s left me stroking myself and craving that exact attention from them.
    But it’s also left me even more perplexed and confused about everything that’s happening inside me.
    It feels so monumental and so colossal that I’m being consumed by the darkness and the total uncertainty of my life.
    Fuck it, I can end it all right now and not feel any more confusion, or any more pain.
    I’ll never have to remember what he did to me, and I’ll never have to look at myself in the mirror again with the knowledge that I’m completely ruined.
    Fuck it.
    Fuck it!
    Fuck him.
    Fuck this life.
    I can’t do it anymore.
    I can’t keep going.
    I stand and pick up the chair I was sitting on, I throw it with every ounce of power I have and it hits the wall and the legs explode with one hurtling toward the window. The useless chair falls to the floor and lays hopelessly in pieces.
    Fuck it.
    Picking my TV up, I smash it with all my energy to the ground.
    Fuck it.
    Fuck it all.
    I hate it.
    I topple the book case over and all my books scatter and spread like the worthless junk they are.
    Like I am, insignificant and nothing.
    “Ryan,” Mason swings the door open and yells at me.
    I turn and see him standing inside my room; he looks completely bewildered and utterly stunned.
    I can’t even hear myself speaking, the rage has taken over and I know I’m yelling, but I don’t know what I’m saying.
    I hate myself.
    I hate my life.
    I hate him .
    I hate them all.
    I pick up the closest thing to me and I throw it at Mason, he moves to the side and it hits the door jamb and smashes into tiny pieces.
    I can’t control it; I can’t seem to make myself stop.
    I don’t want to make myself stop, I just want to hit.
    My eyes