You are a Badass by Jen Sincero Read Free Book Online Page A

constantly deny yourself the people, food, things, and experiences that make you feel the most alive, that sends a pretty lousy message home.
    Look at your life and see where you’re letting yourself down. If you hear yourself saying things like “I love going out to see live music! I can’t remember the last time I did it,” make time.
    We’re all busy, but it’s the people who make enjoying their lives a priority who, um, enjoy their lives. Right now, there are thousands of people all over the world at yoga retreats overlooking the ocean, dancing their asses off at outdoor music festivals or whooping it up on the Disney Cruise of their dreams. Really listen to how you speak and pay attention to what you do, and make a conscious effort to increase your joy in whatever capacity you can. It can be anything from spending a weekday afternoon with a great friend to quitting your hateful job to buying a pair of completely impractical but completely awesome new shoes to going on a surf vacation in Costa Rica. It’s about being proactive about creating a life you love instead of meekly living the one you think you’re stuck with. Give yourself the gift of a joyous life while you’re still among the living.
    Also, if you’re the kind of person who puts everyone else’s needs first, start putting yours up front. Those who are used to you being their personal assistant will still love you, even though they’ll be somewhat grouchy about you not waiting on them hand and foot anymore. Buy a new pair of jeans, open a savings account, hire someone to do your dishes, make your kids clean out the cat box—you aren’t a selfish person for taking care of yourself, just a happier one. Take care of yourself as if you’re the most awesome person you’ve ever met.
    4. FIND A REPLACEMENT
    We’ve gotten so used to our negative knee-jerk reactions to ourselves that we never think to question them—we simply take them as the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth. But once we become aware of our thought patterns and behaviors, we can consciously change them. So start paying attention:
    What runs through your mind when you look in the mirror?
    What happens inside you when you see someone totally succeeding at something you’d love to do but have never let yourself try?
    What do you think and feel when you walk up to a group of really good-looking, successful people?
Or when you try your best to pull something off and you fail?
Or when you get dumped by someone who is totally awesome? And hot?
Or when you walk around all day with your fly open?
Or when you leave your coffee on the roof of your car and drive off?
Or when you let a friend down?
Or when you stub your toe on the kitchen table for the tenth time?
Or when you forget your dad’s birthday?
Or when you snap at someone who didn’t quite deserve it as harshly as you gave it to them?
    Notice the verbiage that runs through your mind when you’re being the most heinous to yourself and come up with a new-and-improved response.
    For example, if every time you look in the mirror, your first thought is yikes , make a conscious effort to change it to hi, gorgeous!
    If you have a complicated relationship with your father and beat yourself up every time you say something awful to him, replace I’m a monster with I’m just a little bunny, working through my issues . And then, of course, apologize to him.
    If your standard response to screwing something up is ugh, Her Royal Clumsiness strikes again , replace it with what can I learn from this?
    The most important thing is to free yourself from the drama and the conviction that your current version of yourself is the truth. I don’t care if you’re all, “that’s easy for you to say; you don’t have a nose that makes it look like someone parked a yacht on your face.” Because one day you could see some fancy and famous fashion model with a nose far bigger than yours is who decided she was gorgeous anyway, and suddenly