Calling Maggie May by Anonymous Read Free Book Online

the zipper down, then slipped the dress off me until I was standing there in my underwear. He wrapped his arms around me.
    â€œThat better?”
    And that’s when it really hit me—we were going to have sex. I guess it seems pretty idiotic that I didn’t realize that earlier. In some sense, I guess I knew when he invited me back to his hotel room. But I didn’t really believe it. It just seemed so unlikely that this guy really wanted me. I kept waiting for him to realize what a boring loser I am and tell me to leave. But when he took my dress off, that’s when I realized—he was not going to change his mind.
    Suddenly I felt nervous and awkward. Kissing was great, but sex was scarier. I started worrying that it would hurt, that Damon would expect me to know what to do, or that he would notice all the blobby bits on my body and get grossed out. But Damon put me at ease. He was undoing the buttons on his shirt, and he leaned forward to whisper in my ear.
    â€œAre you scared?”
    I held my breath and nodded a little. I could feel his breath on my neck and his lips on my earlobe.
    â€œDo you want to stop?”
    And even though I was nervous, I didn’t want him to stop. I was still just so shocked that it was happening at all. I mean, I had more or less given up on this whole idea, on anyone ever wanting me—especially someone I actually wanted back. At school no one ever looked at me that way, and I got used to the idea that I was invisible to the world except as a geek and a nerd. But here I was, in a situation I always thought was reserved for other girls—prettier girls, cooler and more confident girls. At best, maybe one day I’d talk another virginal geek into it, or someone gross and desperate, someone selfish. But Damon was none of those things.
    Of course I knew it wasn’t love—I’m not naive. I don’t expect him to marry me or send me love letters or whatever. But what we were doing . . . It felt good. Just kissing him felt better than I had thought it possibly could, and I would have been happy to keep kissing him all night. But if he’s so good at kissing, it made sense that he’d be good at other stuff too.
    So I kissed him again by way of answer, and I let him pull me over to the bed. He was really slow and careful and it did hurt at first, but it also felt really good. Afterward I felt sore inplaces I hadn’t even realized existed, but he held me and stroked my hair until I fell asleep.
    I guess it sounds super slutty, since I’d only just met him. But it felt right, and you know what? I don’t regret it at all.
    Damon was gone when I woke up, which at first made me a little sad, but honestly, it was kind of a relief too. Last night was so amazing, and I needed some time to process it all this morning. I feel like if he were around, odds are I would do something stupid or embarrassing or awkward that would sour the whole experience. And I don’t want that. I want to cherish this night forever, no matter what else happens.
    He did leave a really sweet note saying that he was glad he got to meet me and apologizing that he had to catch a really early plane this morning. And he told me to go ahead and have breakfast sent up to the room, on his tab! The other hotels I’ve stayed in were definitely the “coffee and doughnuts in the lobby” kind of places, but the room-service menu here has all kinds of amazing things. Would it be bad to order one of everything?
    Oh! I have to call Ada and tell her all about it. I can’t forget I really owe all of this to her.

Sat, Nov 15, later
    Ada’s not very happy with me.
    I don’t totally understand it, and she says it’s not my fault,but apparently it’s a huge deal that I had sex with Damon. I was so excited to tell her all about it! And I was pretty sure she wouldn’t judge me. But I guess I misread the situation.
    I sent her a quick text about