Christmas on Primrose Hill by Karen Swan Read Free Book Online

again: one of the most famous men in the world was following her.
Her.
    She put on a second application of conditioner, just in case.
    A thought struck her as she rinsed – what if . . . what if he
un
followed her? What if she bored him? What if he had already realized she was too boring? Should she have given him some sort of reply to his ‘follow’? She’d already been following him anyway, of course – most of the world did – but what if he wanted an acknowledgement of his attentions?
    She stuck her head round the shower door, eyes wide with horror at the myriad potential faux pas she now had to negotiate.
    ‘What are you looking like that for?’ Jules asked in alarm. ‘I haven’t even told you what it is yet!’
    ‘What if he
un
follows me?’
    Jules relaxed, one arm slung over the cistern and knocking a loo roll to the floor, where it rolled and unwound like a gymnast’s ribbon. ‘Not gonna happen, hon. I just told you – I got it. The big idea.’ Jules’s arms had spread wide, like a circus showman addressing the crowd.
    Nettie sighed as she reached for the towel on the hook, and wrapping it round her tightly, stepped out. She knew Jules wasn’t going to give up – or go away – until she’d shared her grand plan. ‘Fine. Go on, then. Sock it to me.’
    Jules winced at the sight of her bruises from the racetrack, still livid, across her upper arms.
    Nettie – having forgotten about them – looked down, before giving a shrug. It was called Ice Crush for a reason. ‘Yes, well, maybe “sock it to me” is the wrong phrase.’
    ‘We’re going to do a challenge a day.’
    There was a long pause as Nettie dared to exhale. There were many, many things wrong with that statement. Where to start? ‘We?’ she asked finally.
    ‘Well, you. You’re the Blue Bunny Girl. You’re the one with the hashtag.’
    Another pause. ‘A challenge?’
    ‘Yep. Attention-grabbing stuff. Crazy stuff.’ Jules held her hands up quickly. ‘But safe, I promise. Totally safe. Some of it can be just funny stuff, others the best internet memes.’
    There was a long pause as Nettie tried to work out what a ‘meme’ was.
    ‘Ugh, word-of-mouth crazes,’ Jules said, translating her baffled silence. ‘Anything that’s trended.’
    ‘Oh. You said “a day”? How many days are we talking?’
    Jules winked. ‘However long it takes to reel him in.’
    ‘You make him sound like a trout,’ Nettie said, grabbing another towel from the rail and bending forward to wrap her hair in it.
    ‘Well, I’d pout for him,’ Jules winked, picking up a bottle of Chanel No.5 body cream. She unscrewed the lid, sniffing the shell-pink mixture inside.
    ‘Put that down – it’s Mum’s,’ Nettie said, leaping forward and snatching it from her.
    Jules shrank back and Nettie instantly felt guilty for her overreaction. ‘Sorry, it’s just . . . expensive, that’s all.’
    Jules watched as Nettie replaced the cream on the glass shelf and secured her towel into a turban. Nettie stepped on the scales, her hands on her hips. No change, which was annoying. She had wanted to shift three pounds this past week in time for Christmas – five would have been a bonus – but the juicing hadn’t worked out, and by Tuesday she’d switched to paleo, which had clearly been equally as unsuccessful. She blamed the custard creams.
    Jules sagged dejectedly as Nettie chewed her lip and tried standing on one leg to make the dial move left. ‘Is that
it
? You doing your best flamingo impression? It took me bloody ages to draw up this list.’ She waggled the torn piece of jotter paper in her hand.
    Nettie looked up. ‘What’s that?’
    ‘The list of things you’re going to do.’
    ‘I’m not a lab rat, you know. I know what you’re like, and I’m not going to do just
anything
to keep his attention.’
    There was a stunned silence.
    ‘You have remembered we’re talking about Jamie Westlake?’ Jules asked incredulously, leaning forward so that