Deep Green: Color Me Jealous with Bonus Content by Melody Carlson Read Free Book Online

these whacked-out people who get so obsessed with someone that they can’t even control themselves anymore. They drive by some poor unsuspecting slob’s house at all hours of the day and night. Sometimes they park out front and just sit and watch. There are actually laws against it in some states—maybe even ours. But, believe me, it’s a sick, sick thing. It’s been only five days since Timothy broke my heart, but the way I’m acting right now is seriously scaring me.
    You see, I find myself using any excuse I can think of to drive my car around town. I’ll take Tommy to Scouts or Leah to piano lessons or even go to the store for my mom. I’m surprised she’s not suspicious.
    But as soon as I’ve dropped off Leah or Tommy or picked up a gallon of 2-percent milk, I drive directly to Timothy’s house. I slowly cruise by to see if he’s home, and if he’s not, I try to figure out where he might be. My first guess is usually Shawna’s. And so I drive by there next. And on it goes.
    I’ve even taken to using my parents’ cars sometimes, like I’m going undercover. And I can’t believe how much money I’m wasting on gas, not to mention that my homework is suffering. But it’s like I don’t even care about anything except how I can get Timothy back. I know, I know, I shouldn’t want him back so badly. But I do. I can’t even begin to explain why. Maybe it’s because he’s so doggone cute. Or maybe it’s because he’s the most popular jock in school and I think everyone will respect me more if I’m his girl. Or maybe I’m just mad at Shawna and I want to get even. Believe me, I’ve considered all these things. But what I keep coming down to is that it’s just plain and simple love — true love. I mean, really, isn’t it possible that what I feel is the real thing? And like they say in old movies, true love never runs smoothly.
    So I’ve decided I’m not really a stalker, maybe since I don’t want to do Timothy any harm, and I think that stalkers usually do want to hurt someone. I’m just trying to be opportunistic by putting myself in the right place at the right time. I envision us running into each other—well, not literally (although the thought has occurred to me before, like we have this unexpected collision and the next thing I know he’s wiping blood from my forehead and gently kissing me), but mostly I mean running into each other somewhere that I just happen to be at the same time he is. And then we talk and apologize and patch things up, and we are happily back together again, maybe even picking out wedding rings and china patterns.
    Although, I don’t have the same nonviolent feelings toward Shawna. Sometimes I actually wish I could run into her, as in run her down in the middle of the street with my car—hopefully in her cheerleading uniform, leaving this big red and blue blob smeared across the pavement. Okay, not really, since that’s totally gross, not to mention illegal and actually pretty evil. But sometimes I feel as if I’d really like to hurt her.
    Because, believe me, she is asking for it . Every single day this week so far, and this is only Wednesday, Shawna has blatantly flaunted their relationship right in my face. Now, I’ve tried to take Ashley’s advice to “just move on,” at least as far as appearances go. And to the casual observer I’m sure that it looks like I have moved on since I go around wearing my little happy mask all day. I smile and laugh and carry on like my heart’s still in one piece, but beneath it all, I am dying.
    And does Shawna have one single ounce of sympathy for me? Does she care how I may be feeling? Forget about it! She is one twisted devil chick. I think about how careful I was of her feelings when Timothy and I were together, how I tried not to flaunt our relationship. Well, Shawna seems to get her kicks out of torturing me. Believe me, she’s an expert at twisting the knife she so gracefully slipped into my back the night of