Fighting Temptation (Men Of Honor) by K.C. LYNN Read Free Book Online Page A

you.” I’m too tired to stop the tears streaming down my cheeks. There’s so much pain in his eyes after I say this that I cry harder.
    “I’m sorry Jul…”
    I rip my arm out of his grasp, “Jaxson if you say ‘sorry’ one more time I swear to God I’m going to hit you!” I sigh frustrated, “whatever, I just wanna go home.”
    I turn and start walking to the car with the blanket under my arm. I hear him swear and shuffle around grabbing his shirt, then he’s following behind me.
    I stare out my window while we ride home in silence. So many feelings consume me: hurt, anger and, most of all, fear. I’m so scared that we won’t be able to fix this and I’ll lose him forever.
    We pull up to my house and both get out of the car. Before I can think of what to say, he says: “Remember Julia if you need anything, go to Cooper.”
    I stare at him, trying to see what he’s feeling but his eyes are cold and distant, he’s completely closed himself off to me. I can’t believe after everything we’ve been through together that’s all he’s going to say. I shake my head sadly, “I don’t need a damn babysitter, I can take care of myself. Goodbye Jaxson.”
    At that I turn and run into the house before I completely lose myself in front of him. As soon as I close the door behind me, I fall against it and shatter, knowing I just lost the one person that will hold my heart forever.
     

     
    I watch the one person that means the most to me in the entire fucking world run out of my life. And I don’t stop her, because I know in the end it’s for the best.
    “Jesus, what the fuck just happened?” You lost control and fucked up, that’s what happened.
    I can’t believe I fucking did this. I run my hand through my hair in frustration and get a trace of her scent from my fingers. The memory of her tight hot pussy contracting around my fingers will haunt me for the rest of my life.
    ‘ I love you Jaxson. ’ It’s the first time anyone has said those words to me and it makes my chest hurt so fucking bad that I want to rip my goddamn heart out so I don’t feel it.
    I want to go in after her and tell her just how much she means to me but I know in the end it still won’t change why we can’t be together. I wish things were different, I wish I had different blood running through my veins, I wish I was good enough. I look up at her house one last time before I get on my bike.
    My throat feels so tight I can’t swallow. Jesus Christ, what the fuck is happening to me! I haven’t cried since I was 7 years old and I swore I never would again. But that’s what Julia does to me, what she has always done to me, makes me feel shit I never thought I’d feel again.
    Pissed at myself now for being weak, I start the bike up and take off.

 
     
     
    I wake up to my phone ringing and moan, feeling like I have been hit by a truck. I squint with my red puffy eyes at my screen and see Kayla’s number. Oh god, what time is it? Checking my clock next to me I see it’s 7:40 am. Shit! The ferry leaves in 20 minutes. I shoot out of bed and take a quick peek in the mirror. Yup, I also look like I’ve been hit by a truck. Darn. I don’t have time to make myself presentable so I quickly throw my hair up in a high messy bun, throw a cardigan over my black booty shorts and matching tank that I wore to bed. I forgo a bra knowing there’s not enough time to put one on. I grab a pair of the biggest sunglasses I own to hide my puffy blood-shot eyes and bound down the stairs. As I’m putting my flip-flops on Grams peeks in from the kitchen.
    “Julia, are you okay? Where are you going so early?”
    “I don’t have time to explain right now Grams but I need to see Jaxson before he leaves. I have to make things right.” I feel bad running out the door when she’s calling my name but I’m so scared I’m not going to make it in time, so I don’t stop.
    I drive as fast as I dare, praying I don’t get pulled over and arrive 5 minutes