Putting the Madge in Danna by Mia Natasha Read Free Book Online

the tape for me. We shook hands. He said he
would mail me an additional tape of the songs we’d discussed for
the processional and a mix for the reception, for when the Greek
folk band takes a break.
    Tomorrow I’m headed to my future
mother-in-law’s. I should probably buy some creamy colored towels
when she takes me to Macy’s. Something that easily hides the cunt
residue of my soaky-wetty and naughty hooey.
    Comments:5 The lesbian friend of Madonna’s, Sandra Bernhard , did indeed have a
relationship with Madonna. I bet you can’t guess who was the top
and who the bottom? Shae Stewart, Long Beach,
CA
    Dannika, I’ll be waiting
for you at the Marriott in Times Square. August
29 th .
I’ll give you the ride of your life. And you won’t see a flaccid
penis. Rob,
NY, NY
    You may be a feisty Greek
goddess, but sexy you ain’t! Boxman, Inside-a-cunt,
IL This is all lies. May you get a gypsy
curse for stealing my niece’s identity! Auntie Sofia, Toronto, Ont., Canada
    When are you going to fuck the black guy?
I’m on stand-by if you need me. Tyrone, Atlanta, GA
    ****
    Like a Virgin
    Sunday, JULY 26, 2009 - 10:00am
    I’m at work right
now . Eiffel Travel is open seven days a
week and that means I’m here at least two Sundays a month. No one else is here, which is great because I’m
listening to Bedtime
Stories . It’s so soothing. I could have
sex to every song on this CD. The blinds are open the way they are
supposed to be when we’re open for business, otherwise I’d be
tweaking right now.
    My titty-titty-bang-bangs are in desperate
need to break free of their padded bra. Just the thought of it
secretes my hooey to the point of damp panties. Should have worn a
Stayfree. Wouldn’t it be weird if this were a naked travel agency?
I think I saw that once on HBO. We’d have to cover the chairs with
a protective film to protect them from all the pre-cum
back-lash.
    If it were a nudie-toons, then Gina Romano
and I would be the stars since the other two women who work here
are a bit zaftig - although some men prefer that look. I shouldn’t
judge. Gina is my best friend though, and she is beautiful. She’s
Italian and Irish with dark hair, blue eyes, freckles, and
titty-ta-tas that put mine to shame. She is two years older than
me, and she’s been married for a year - to her college boyfriend
Vince, who happens to be Zeus’ bestie as well as a documentary film
director. Vince is going to videotape our wedding.
    Kathy Duke-Dike, our
office manager, always seems to have a boyfriend despite putting in
over fifty hours a week and having a smushy watermelon booty-boot
from all the sitting she does at the agency. Apparently, her deep,
dark secret is that she is the blowjob queen of Schenectady – Gina
ran into a friend of a friend of hers, that’s how we know. I think
it says so in her high school yearbook. The Duke-Dike sucks cock not pussy –
something like that. Her lips are like balloons that could float a
pricker to the moon so it must be true.
    And this is ironic - even
though she bleaches her hair blonde and wears tons of crucifixes
all the time, Kathy hates Madonna. She never lets me listen to my
pop-icon’s music, forcing me to throw my head phones on when she’s
here, which makes me seem anti-social even though I’m not. If I
don’t do that, and there are no customers, she demands we listen
full blast to oldies like instrumental versions of Hotel California on one
of the old lady radio stations that the travel agency allows as
their Muzak in here. Okay, so she only did that once.
    Gina and Bunky Hewitt
aren’t like that when they are at work, although if I play Madonna
then Gina will want a stab at Lady Gaga as a form of compromise.
Gaga is a Madonna disciple, I think, so it’s no biggie. She was
totally doing Madonna poses in her latest video, right? Bunky’s
kind of easy-going, so she doesn’t care what we listen to, although
she prefers quiet, especially when she’s searching for the
comparative