Spirit Horses by Alan Evans Read Free Book Online

person from more than he can handle in times
like these. This mental escape was Shane’s subconscious way of shielding
himself from a pain he was too exhausted to endure.
    Hours later he was still at her side when he felt a
gentle arm across his back. Then he heard some familiar voices. It was Helen
and Abby. Terry and Beth Ann were also there standing quietly in the corner. No
one knew what to say. They were all feeling the loss of little Tina, but their
immediate concern was for Shane. It was Helen’s quavering voice that finally
broke the silence. “Come on, Shane, we have to go. She’s gone, there’s nothing
more you can do here. The doctor’s going to give you something to help.” He
barely noticed the needle piercing through the flesh of his right shoulder or
the burning of the sedative as it slowly entered his muscle. It was still some
time before he stood and left the room with everyone
huddled around.

 
    It took all the strength Shane had to make it through the triple funeral. If it hadn’t been for Jen’s mom, he
probably couldn’t have done it. Helen was a strong woman. Shane had seen that
by watching her through the death of her own husband years earlier. She and
Abby had made all the burial arrangements, and their constant support was the
only thing keeping Shane from going completely off the deep end. He felt so
alone, sad, and angry all at the same time. What had he or they ever done to
deserve this? He cursed at God, screamed at himself, and then turned to the
bottle to deaden the pain.
    Helen made the decision to stay on for a while. She
cooked and cleaned, and, in the midst of dealing with her own grief, she tried
her best to console him.
    The next couple of weeks were the worst of Shane’s
life. He was not eating much and he couldn’t sleep. He’d taken all of the meds
that the doctors had prescribed, and when they were gone, he depended on
whiskey to help him escape his hell.
    Helen was on the front porch when Terry walked up
from the barn and sat next to her. It was 2:30 in the afternoon, and only
eighteen days after the accident. “I wish there was more I could do for him,”
he mumbled.  
    “You’ve done plenty, Terry; the way you and Beth Ann
have taken over running the farm proves what good friends you are.”
    “Well, it’s easy to see he’s in no shape to come
back to work yet. You tell him not to worry about the business. All of his
clients understand. I’ll keep their horses worked until he is ready to ride.”
    Helen took a deep breath. “I’m very worried about
him, Terry. He hasn’t been out of the house in days.”
    “Yes, ma’am, I know what you mean. While you were at
the grocery store yesterday, I came over to check on him. I pounded and pounded
on the door before he finally opened it. It was only one o’clock, he stunk of
whiskey and seemed really depressed. Don’t get me wrong, if I lost Beth Ann and
the baby I’d probably be in the same condition. But the truth is I’m scared
he’s close to a breaking point.”
    Helen closed her eyes, “He’s too proud to admit he
needs help. I think we’d better keep a close eye on him.”
    “Yes, ma’am, I agree.”

 
    It was late on a Monday, and still only four weeks since the accident.
A stormy dusk began closing in on the farm. Abby had come over earlier and was
just heading out the door to go home. Shane walked her out to her car to tell
her good-bye, when she noticed his speech was a little slurred from the three
drinks he’d consumed since 4:00. Even so, both she and Helen were glad to see
him out. Helen was standing at the door and waved as Abby drove away.
    “Hey, Helen,” Shane shouted, “looks like Terry is
working late. I’m going to the barn to help him finish up so he can get home
for dinner.”
    Helen was elated at this. “You go ahead, we’ll eat
when you’re done.”
    The evening was warm. A low growl of thunder rumbled
overhead as the slight smell of rain lingered in the air. Because of