The Doctor's Baby by Cindy Kirk Read Free Book Online

Lexi’s lips curved in a slight smile. “Leaving Adam with Mary Karen will be like leaving him with…a favorite aunt.”
     
    Once July had gotten settled into her new place, she’d been exhausted and had gone to bed early. But despite overwhelming fatigue, sleep eluded her. So at half past two, she gave up trying. She picked up the phone and called her oldest and dearest friend.
    They talked about the baby for a few minutes and about his new gig. Then she told him about David and what she’d discovered. She could tell by the silence on the other end he was waiting for her to get down to the real reason she’d called. July took a deep breath and reminded herself this was A.J. There was nothing she couldn’t say to him.
    “I couldn’t do it,” July whispered into the phone. “All I had to do was say, ‘Hey, I told you he wasn’t your son because I thought you were married and I’m sorry I lied.’ Super simple, right?”
    “For anyone else it’d be a piece of cake,” A.J. said softly. “But they didn’t have your life.”
    July had always considered herself a survivor. She and A.J. had once even officially promised each other that they would not let their past determine their future. But this latest challenge told her the past still controlled her life.
    “I hate her,” July said, the words hanging in the air.
    “I don’t blame you,” A.J. said. “The woman wasn’t fit to raise a dog.”
    “She locked me in a closet for spilling a bottle of booze.” July’s voice rose. The hand holding the phone began to shake. Her heart pounded against her ribs. “It was an accident. I told her I was sorry. I told her over and over and over again. It only seemed to make her angrier. But even when she hit me and told me to shut up, I couldn’t stop saying it. Then she shoved me into that closet. If one of her boyfriends hadn’t gone looking for a coat the next day, I’d still be in there.”
    “I know, babe. I know.”
    She swiped at her tears. “I don’t know why I’m going on and on. You’ve heard it all before. And it was a long time ago anyway.”
    “It may have been a long time ago, but those kind of memories stick with you.”
    “I’ve tried to put them in the past. Take those horrible memories and stuff them in some sort of mental box and throw away the key. But that hasn’t worked.” July expelled a frustrated breath. “Every time I even think of telling David I’m sorry I lied to him, it’s like I’m back in that closet, hearing her scream at me to shut up.”
    “July.” A.J. paused for a long moment. “You know I’m not big on shrinks….”
    “You think I’m crazy, don’t you? You think—”
    “I think you’re very strong. I think you wouldn’t have made it through all you’ve had to deal with if you weren’t,” A.J. said in a firm tone. “But I also think you’ve carried this baggage long enough. It’s time you moved on.”
    “I’ve tried,” July whispered, feeling more like a failure than ever.
    “I know you have. But this is heavy and I’m thinking you might need some help.”
    July swiped her sweaty palms against her nightgown. “I want to get past it.”
    “Then take the first step. Find a counselor you can trust and share your burden with them. Do it because you’re strong and because you don’t want this to affect your relationship with Adam.”
    “I don’t kn—”
    “Promise me, July,” A.J. said. “Promise me you’ll at least give it a try.”
    She knew what A.J. was saying made sense. But to share her deepest, darkest secrets with a stranger? Then Adam stirred and when her gaze settled on the baby, her baby, she knew she had no choice.
    “Promise me, July,” he said more insistently this time.
    July took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’ll do it.”
    “Good.”
    “What about David? What should I do about him?”
    “For now—nothing. Cut yourself some slack and trust that when the time is right, you’ll do what needs to be