policeman.”
“When I was a student, it wasn’t obvious to me.”
“Fool! Not then! Now! My God, don’t you understand anything?”
“No.”
“But you are saying that you conspired with him? You are raising suspicions against a civil servant? You know, such testimony is a very serious matter, even if you’re innocent!”
“I don’t know anything. I suspect no one and have done nothing.”
“Do you deny that you were born here?”
“No.”
“Good. And do you deny that you were once hauled away from here, yet that still didn’t keep you from returning after the war was over?”
“No, but—”
“There, you see, that explains it! That’s all we need. You haven’t done anything, that’s correct, simply because we have stopped you before you could. And that’s all we need. You needn’t think yourself innocent, because there’s no way you can be. No, you were looking to start something.”
“That’s not true.”
“Quiet! You wanted to. Otherwise you wouldn’t have tried to slip into the country.”
“I didn’t slip in. I’m legal, and I came on a regularly scheduled train—”
“And almost were arrested for violent resistance when our border police wanted to inspect your passport.”
“That’s not true.”
“Really? And you didn’t raise any kind of a stink when they wanted to hold your passport for security reasons? And you didn’t give cause for suspicion on the day when you were not ashamed to demand a written receipt of your passport and assumed you’d get one?”
“Part of it isn’t true; part of it is completely distorted. I wanted my passport, but I neither asked for a receipt nor was given one.”
“So you’re denying it even happened? I’m warning you!”
“I deny any kind of bad intention.”
The Assessor and the secretary, who was typing hurriedly, shook with laughter.
“To us there is no one who, after having once emigrated, returns without bad intentions. You have to at least see how it looks to us.”
“I wanted to see my teacher. That’s all.”
“Excellent. That’s all we need. But let me remind you that to just take your high treason and all your bad intentions and just shove them onto your old teacher is obscene.”
“Prenzel lured me into a trap?”
“Is that a question?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t ask the questions here. Besides, you should have thought about all that earlier.”
“I’ve had it completely up to here with this visit, and I don’t want to wait another day before returning to the country of my choice.”
“You’ll have to remain here, at least until we hear the decision handed down by the judge.”
“Am I charged with something?”
“Not yet. First, you have to confess. Since you don’t seem inclined to do that today, I’ll give you a day to think about it. Later the jail time, if that’s what you’re given, will be a good deal longer—a month, maybe even a year.”
“I object! I demand that I be allowed to contact my embassy immediately.”
“If that’s meant as a plea bargain, and there’s no doubt about your culpability, then I can formally remand you for trial immediately. If, however—”
“It’s not a plea! Not at all! It’s a demand for human and legal rights!”
“Spare me your lousy, stupid speeches! You’ve already gone too far and made matters worse with your loud protests. There is, however, an honorable way out.…”
The Assessor of Sympathies paused and looked at me searchingly to see if I understood what he meant, waiting for me to give a sign that I understood. However, I had no idea and sat there unhappy on my stool. Since the Assessor gave no hint of what he meant, I tried hard to think of something smart and to come up with the right answer. Nothing occurred to me except to ask if I could raise my seat. That way, I would at least learn whether my situation had at all improved. The Assessor seemed not to have understood, for he completely ignored my request, saying instead