The Wilt Inheritance by Tom Sharpe Read Free Book Online Page A

the fire alarm is the very least of it!’ cried Ms Young, who went on to produce a catalogue of other misdemeanours – putting it mildly – that the Wilt girls had committed, and was in nearly all cases backed up by Miss Sanger. By the time the little meeting was over the Headmistress was forced to admit it was very difficult to know how best to deal with the four girls. In the end she agreed she would write to Mr and Mrs Wilt, telling them that she would have to consider asking them to remove their daughters the following year unless their behaviour improved
    ‘It’s probably a waste of time,’ sighed Ms Young as she and Miss Sanger walked down the corridor. ‘Have you ever seen their mother?’ Miss Sanger hadn’t. ‘A dreadfully vulgar woman – and I do mean vulgar. I don’t know why the Headmistress agreed to let them come here in the first place.’
    ‘Possibly because their father is the head of some sort of university faculty,’ Miss Sanger suggested.
    ‘I think it more likely it’s because we’ve never hadquadruplets in the school before. And because enrolment figures have shrunk so. I suppose having quads in the school makes us appear interesting. The little bitches are certainly unique, but in a truly dreadful sort of way. I’m just hoping they do something really appalling and get themselves expelled. I can’t take much more.’
    They parted and Ms Young marched back to her house with a very nasty expression on her face.
    Outside the Headmistress’s study, Samantha waited until she’d heard her leave the room before emerging cautiously from the shrubbery next to the window. She raced off to report back to the other three.
    ‘The old cow is going to write to Mum and Dad to warn them we’ll have to leave if we don’t behave really well next term.’
    ‘Ms Young said Emmy’s setting off the fire alarm was the last straw. She thinks we’re a pack of savages.’
    ‘I like that! They’re all snobs. Especially the Young bitch. I vote we do something to her car,’ said Emmeline. ‘That’ll teach her.’
    ‘Like what? Stuff a potato up the exhaust pipe like we did to that beastly old man at home, Mr Floren? He had to have the engine taken to bits before they found it.’
    Emmeline shook her head.
    ‘Something much better. Something that will wreck the motor and stop her driving for a long time.’
    ‘Sugar in the petrol tank would do that,’ said Penelope, thoughtfully. ‘It takes some time though. Coats the pistons and valves gradually and then the engine seizes up.’
    ‘Wait, I know,’ interrupted Josephine. ‘I heard the mechanic who services our car telling a man that carborundum powder ruins an engine for good.’
    ‘And where do we get carborundum powder? Sugar’s easier.’
    ‘What if she locks the petrol-tank cap?’ asked Samantha.
    ‘She didn’t when she took Martha and me to the dentist last week,’ Emmeline told them. ‘She needed more petrol and just got out and unscrewed the cap with the keys still in the car.’
    ‘You mean, she left the engine running?’
    ‘Of course not. She’s not a complete idiot. She turned off the engine and left the keys in the car, which means it must be the sort which doesn’t lock. Should be easy to pour a bag of sugar down it.’
    ‘And have it stick to the side of the inlet where she can see it? Don’t be so lame,’ Samantha dismissed this suggestion.
    ‘Oh, brilliant,’ retorted Emmeline. ‘Have you ever seen anyone peering down into their petrol tank? Even at the garage they’re only looking at the pump to see if it’s working properly and how much they’re putting in.’
    ‘All the same, we ought to test if sugar dissolves inalcohol,’ was Penelope’s comment. ‘I’ve got some eau de cologne we could use, and we can buy a bag of sugar from the shop in the village.’
    ‘We don’t need to. I’ve got some in my locker. I pinched it during Cookery when Mrs Drayton wasn’t looking. We can use that,’ said