Alex by Adam J Nicolai Read Free Book Online

of his life: getting raped by Leroy Eston?  
    Where the fuck were you, Ian?   Where the fuck were you ?
    He shuddered, felt his stomach quake again.   He glanced around as if suddenly becoming aware of his surroundings.   He was alone.   Alex would come if he stayed alone.    
    "Derek?"   Ian took to his feet.   "Where are you?"
    "Kitchen," Derek called.   "Getting you a beer, you fucking need one."
    Ian got up and went to the kitchen.   Derek was closing the fridge door.   "Ian, god, would you sit down?   Seriously.   You're freaking me out here."
    I don't want to be alone , Ian almost said.   When I'm alone I see things.   "Okay.   Sorry."
    Derek gave him a Coors Light as they sat down.   Ian turned it in his hands, feeling the cold aluminum, staring at it like he'd unearthed an alien artifact.  
    "Light?" he finally observed.   "You must not be too worried about me."
    Derek let out a relieved sigh, like his friend had been in a trance and he had just been starting to wonder if he needed to call 911.   "Yeah.   Well.   Jake doesn't like the hard stuff."  
    "Things going well with him?" Ian asked, not because it had been on his mind, but because he needed time.  
    "Yeah, I think so.   He doesn't love the raiding schedule.   You know how that goes.   But he's smart and funny and has a great ass."   Derek waggled his eyebrows.  
    Ian looked at his friend, but he wasn't really seeing him.   He was seeing the cellar pantry.   "That's good."
    Derek's grin faded.   "Ian, come on.   Are you gonna tell me what's going on?   Did something happen with Alina?   Did she...?"   He stopped.   They both knew what he was going to ask.
    "No.   No, we're still happily married."   Ian shook his head.   He was profoundly grateful to have company, but maybe it had been stupid to come over here.   He couldn't tell Derek what had happened.   He couldn't tell anyone, unless he wanted to end up getting committed.
    "What then?"
    "I just... I couldn't stay in that house tonight.   You know?   Not tonight."
    Derek watched him.   "Getting pretty quiet over there, I bet."
    Ian nodded at his beer.  
    "Well, you know you can come over anytime.   And you have a key, right?"
    Ian had forgotten about that.   Derek had proudly shared keys with a few of his closest friends when he'd bought the house last year.  
    "I mean, you know.   Call first.   But yeah.   Whenever."
    "Thanks."
    They were quiet for awhile.  
    "Were you raiding tonight?" Ian asked.  
    "I was going to.   I cancelled when you called.   You freaked me out."
    "Go ahead, if they still have your spot.   I'll watch."  
    "You sure?   Do you want to play?"
    Ian shook his head.   "Not tonight."
    30
     
    He came awake suddenly, coughing back a snore, drool sticky on his cheek.   A scream of light was stabbing into his eyes.
    "Ah, shit.   Sorry about that."   Derek repositioned the curtains, blocked the sun.   "I didn't mean to wake you up."
    "S'okay," Ian croaked, and cleared his throat.   "What time is it?"   He pushed himself to a sitting position.   Apparently he had passed out on a bean bag.   Last night he had lounged in it, briefly, watching Derek's game.  
    "Little after eleven."
    "Holy shit," Ian stated.   He groaned to his feet.   "Fucking hell.   I am getting too old to sleep on beanbags."
    Derek chuckled.   "You didn't look very comfortable, but you were sleeping like the dead.   I was gonna bring you to the guest bed, but I figured I wouldn't fuck with it.   You were out cold."
    "Fuck," Ian answered.   He stretched his stiff arms, tried to roll the hard knot out of his neck.   It ignored him.
    They got breakfast at the Osseo Cafe.   Derek paid, despite Ian's insistence to the contrary.   Then Ian tagged along while Derek ran some errands: Target, Cub, the post office.   They shot the shit, made fun of people, and generally behaved like they were still in high school.   Ian couldn't remember the last time he had