Coco Pinchard, the Consequences of Love and Sex: A Funny, Feel-Good, Romantic Comedy by Robert Bryndza Read Free Book Online

cropped close to his head.
    ‘You’re not on another diet love?’ I asked.
    ‘No, Ibiza was crazy, I sort of forgot to eat!’ he grinned. ‘Did you see my Instagram photos?’
    I said we had; all five hundred of them. He gave Adam and me a huge hug, and then knelt down to tickle Rocco’s little furry face.
    ‘Can I get you a drink Rosencrantz?’ said Adam.
    ‘I’ll have a beer, thanks.’  
    Adam went off into the kitchen and we came into the living room, Rosencrantz carrying Rocco.
    ‘As you can see we haven’t quite got round to unpacking,’ I said.
    ‘You’ve been back for a month,’ he laughed. ‘That’s classic Mum!’ Adam came back in with drinks, beers for them and an orange juice for me.  
    ‘Let’s sit down,’ I said nervously. We all sat by the fire. Rosencrantz downed half his bottle of beer in one gulp. I looked at Adam. I went to open my mouth when Rosencrantz said,
    ‘I’ve got huge news!’
    ‘What’s that love?’ I asked.
    ‘You know Oscar, my housemate? Well he’s no longer my housemate…’ he looked at us with a grin.
    ‘Is he moving out?’ asked Adam.
    ‘No. He’s no longer my housemate because he is my boyfriend.’
    ‘ That’s lovely,’ I said. Rosencrantz went on,
    ‘Do you think it’s going to be weird? I don’t think it will be because we’ve lived together in the house share with Wayne for a year now, and I really love Oscar, and he loves me. He told me so the other night at Pizza Hut.’
    We stared at him with fixed smiles. This wasn’t going to plan. I’d wanted to get it over with, and tell him about the baby as quickly as possible. All I could say was,
    ‘Ooh. Pizza Hut?’
    ‘Yes I know what you’re thinking, Pizza Hut, how can that be romantic? But it was romantic because it was so low key… I mean you watch those shows like ‘The Bachelor’ where they have a meal under the stars with champagne, but it’s just so staged and pre-meditated.’
    Adam and I still didn’t know what to say. All I could come up with was, ‘I’ve never seen ‘The Bachelor’ . ’
    ‘Oh it’s quite good Mum,’ he said. ‘I know I’ve never told anyone I loved them before. I don’t want you to worry; we are serious but I’m not going to do it without a condom.’
    ‘Rosencrantz, I’m your mother!’ I said.
    ‘Surely you want me to be honest with you? It’s the next step in a gay relationship, to take HIV tests and have unprotected sex. You always told me to use a condom, and that’s what I’ll do. Of course that was when you thought I liked girls and could get them pregnant, but it’s just as important when you’re gay.’
    I went to interrupt but he laughed saying,
    ‘Just think yourself lucky I am gay and I won’t get some girl pregnant. You two have only just got married, and you wouldn’t want to have to babysit some screaming tot!’
    ‘Rosencrantz, we’ve got something to…’ but he cut me off.
    ‘We might do a Civil Partnership though, wouldn’t that be cool?’ he finished off his beer.
    ‘Are you not drinking Mum?’ he asked, noticing my orange juice.
    ‘No, I’m not…’
    ‘What? Come on Mum, you’ve moved back home, and I’ve got a gorgeous new man. Let’s celebrate! I’ll grab you a beer.’ He left the room and came back with two beers, and downed half of one again.
    ‘No, I’m fine thanks love.’
    ‘Go on Mum. You’re not on some stupid January detox?’
    ‘No.’
    ‘Then have a drink silly,’ he said pushing the bottle at me.
    ‘I can’t,’ I said. ‘Look, sit down, I have to tell you something.’ Rosencrantz sat down. I suddenly felt embarrassed.   Adam held my hand.
    ‘Rosencrantz, love… It started a couple of weeks ago, when I couldn’t keep my food down, so I went to see the doctor…’
    ‘Oh my God,’ said Rosencrantz, his beautiful green eyes filling up with tears. ‘I’ve been going on and you’ve been diagnosed with …’  
    ‘No,’ I smiled. ‘No. I’m not ill; I’ve not been