In Your Dreams by Tom Holt, Tom Holt Read Free Book Online

property in the desk drawers unless you want it shredded by four-inch claws. You should see the second-floor ladies’ loo, by the way. I guess the partners never think to go in there when they’re making good the damage on a Monday morning.’
    That reminded Paul of something else. ‘Did they happen to mention,’ he said as casually as he could manage (about as casual as the Buckingham Palace sentry, unfortunately), ‘why they needed a receptionist? Only, up till now a couple of the goblins—’
    â€˜Mr Tanner’s mother, yes. Haven’t you heard? She’s pregnant, apparently, and goblins are rather old-fashioned about maternity leave and stuff.’
    â€˜Bloody hell.’ One good thing – no, two, or make that three. First, the joyful thought of how Mr Tanner was going to react when presented with a baby brother or sister. Second, if Mr Tanner’s mum was going to be out of circulation for a while, he’d be able to get out of the habit of scanning every attractive female he passed in the street for signs of twinkling eyes and feral grins. Third; third, fourth and fifth, Melze was going to be there, every day from now on, and he’d always liked Melze. A lot—
    Oh shit , he thought. Not again .
    She was eating her Danish pastry. She’d been a messy eater when she was nine, and she hadn’t changed; bits of pastry shrapnel were spattered around her nose, chin and mouth. He caught himself noticing her mouth, and quickly looked away. That was very bad; because (up till now) Melze was the only female of approximately his own age with whom he’d ever felt comfortable. When they’d been kids together, they’d got into trouble splashing about in her dad’s stagnant, leaf-clogged goldfish pond, hunting mosquito larvae with a butterfly net; they’d mangled balsa-wood aircraft and tangled kite strings in shrubs together, fought over alleged rule infringements in marathon Monopoly tournaments, broken each other’s toys. They’d been friends , even though she was technically a girl. It’d been like E.T. and all those other movies where a human and an alien forge bonds of friendship across the species divide. And now – now she’d betrayed all that, he couldn’t help feeling, because she’d metamorphosed into a beautiful, or at least pleasant-looking, or at least not hideously deformed, young woman, one of those dangerous creature who break your heart and leave you notes and go away, filling the world with black holes ...
    â€˜Quite.’ Melze was still chattering happily away, apparently oblivious of her own foul treachery. ‘You must know, is it true that goblins can make themselves look just like people? That could be – well, awkward, I suppose.’
    â€˜Very,’ Paul heard himself say. ‘Especially since you can’t trust them any further than you could sneeze them out of a blocked nostril. Have you come across them yet?’
    â€˜Hardly.’ She smiled again, but this time he was ready for her, and looked away. ‘It’s only my first day, remember? I’ve met all the partners, though. That Ricky Wurmtoter – he’s a specimen, isn’t he?’
    Paul wasn’t quite sure what she meant by that, but caught himself feeling suddenly and furiously jealous, just in case it signified lust. ‘He’s gone off on some job,’ he said quickly. ‘Won’t be back for ages. In fact, I’m, um, filling in for him till he gets back.’
    â€˜Really?’ Melze was looking at him with her oncoming-lorry-headlight eyes. ‘But he does all the dragon slaying and vampire hunting and stuff, doesn’t he?’
    â€˜That’s right.’
    â€˜Cool.’ He was still looking away, but he could feel the smile. He could probably have toasted muffins over it. ‘And that’s what you do, is it?’
    â€˜Yes,’ Paul squeaked. ‘Well,