so like someone else could almost do instead of her.â
âNot in this case,â said Ninian. âAnd not in any real one. No one can take the place of anyone else.â
âLavinia did take this one,â said Leah. âBut she has to go back from it now.â
âWhy, what an odd phrase!â said Miss Starkie.
âIt meant what she meant it to mean,â said Hengist.
âDear, dear, how you overwork your words! I feel quite sorry for them.â
âI have never seen Lavinia cry before,â said Leah, in a sudden awed tone.
âYou need not see it now,â said Hengist, roughly.
âNo, do not notice it,â said Miss Starkie, speaking very low. âYou know how you feel when you cry.â
âI sometimes do it to make people notice me.â
âThat is because you are young,â said Hengist.
âI will cry with Lavinia,â said Hugo. âAnd thenpeople will have to notice us. And I hope they will be upset.â
âEgbert, have you taken a vow of silence?â said Ninian.
âIt would be better if I had, Father. It would be an excuse.â
âIt is not such a difficult occasion.â
âI think it is,â said Teresa, without a smile. âIt has to be; and not only for them.â
âYou are finding it so? You need not be alarmed. They are no worse than they seem.â
âI am not alarmed,â said Teresa, as if she might be other things.
âWould you like to have some children?â said Leah, looking at her. âI mean some of your own?â
âShe could hardly want any more of mine,â said Ninian.
âWe canât help being here,â said Hengist.
âNow who suggested that you could speak?â said Miss Starkie. âYou should think before you speak.â
âI donât feel I am here,â said Hugo. âAnd I hope nobody knows I am.â
âI should not be,â said Egbert, âif it were not for Lavinia. I get my reality from her, and always shall.â
âThere, Lavinia!â said Miss Starkie. âThere is a foundation for your future.â
âAnd what is that?â said Ninian.
âHer brotherâs dependence on her, Mr. Middleton. It is a rare and real thing,â said Miss Starkie, looking aside as she relinquished restraint.
âThey must release each other in time for their lives to grow.â
âReleasing is a very wicked thing,â murmured Egbert.
âWhat did you say?â said Ninian.
âI said it to Lavinia, Father.â
âNow will you say it to me?â
âI said that releasing wasâmight be a wicked thing.â
âOh!â said Ninian, in light dismissal of this. âThe same old puzzle for you! That I do not belong to anyone, body and soul.â
âDoes he not?â said Lavinia to her brother.
Ninian looked sharply at her, but checked his words.
âHow much will you belong to me?â said Teresa. âWith all this force drawing you away.â
âAs much as it is right to belong to anyone. As much as I shall ask you to belong to me. But as much as that for our lives.â
âThere is the difference,â said Lavinia. âIt cannot come to an end. No, I shall not repeat it, Father. We must be allowed to speak to each other. We have not been struck dumb.â
âI think people should talk to me,â said Hugo. âIt is their duty to include me in the occasion. Suppose I felt I was an alien after all!â
âI will talk to you,â said Teresa. âAnd ask you about this family, and all that is hidden in it. I feel I have never met one before.â
âYou have not met this one. A family is itself. And of course things are hidden in it. They could hardly be exposed. You will be wise not to know about them. Think of Miss Starkie, spending her life trying to keep them hidden.â
âI should not aim at her level. But I need some help on my
Learning to Kill: Stories